u/Ancient_Body_8554

i've had a very hard time making friends my whole life due to simply sucking at social interactions, so i was thrilled when i got SUPER close with this girl. it's been about a month since we stopped being friends, and i suddenly want nothing more than to have her back as a friend, even if her opinions were so controversial to me.

she was the best friend i ever had. she broke me out of a toxic relationship with my other old best friend and she helped me realize my self worth. despite her interesting viewpoints, she was the sweetest, and 100% the funniest person i've ever met. it hurts not even being able to say hello to her in the hallways anymore, and occasionally we make eye contact in classes but it's always the awkward look-away-and-pretend-nothing-happened look. i would run straight back to her if it weren't for the different beliefs.

i'll always miss her. maybe one day it'll all go back to normal.

for context, i've had a very hard time making friends my whole life due to simply sucking at social interactions. so i was thrilled when i got SUPER close with this girl. (i'll call her P when the time comes around)

the first year or so of me knowing her, i never really talked to her all that much and didn't know anything about her. it wasn't until the last few months of 7th grade that we became friends in art class, and we got closer over the summer and were best friends throughout most of 8th grade. i was basically a part of her friend group, hanging out with her and getting closer with her friends as well. she's the funniest person i've met in my entire life, and through the year that we were friends we were completely inseparable.

that is, until, the end of 8th grade. her other friends slowly started dropping her and i didn't know why. eventually, she started making comments that i simply could not forget; about race, about sexuality, about certain political figures. i was baffled when she started making these comments, because she was the sweetest, funniest, most amazing person i knew. at least i thought so.

one of our friends is a lesbian. me, P, and the lesbian girl A, along with a few others, all sit together in art, still to the day i'm writing this. it was just a random Tuesday when P and A got in a heated, full-blown argument about A's sexuality. P is heavily Christian, the type of Christian that strictly listens to the bible, and that "man shall not lay with man" or however it goes. (i don't have a problem with Christians obviously, please don't take this personally if you are one) She basically and indirectly called A's entire existence a sin, and that she "didn't have a problem with queer people," she "just thinks it's wrong". that was my own breaking point of the comments she would make, so me, A, and the rest of our group asked to have a meeting with a councilor to have a civil friendship break-up so we wouldn't end up yelling at each other again like we were in art.

the issue being, I didn't want to fully break up with her. if you've ever broken up with your friends, you probably understand how awkward it can be making eye contact in the hallway and having to pretend you didn't love them a month ago. i didn't want that. i wanted to be able to be friends, the ones that say hello in the hallways and can ask for a pencil if you need one, things like that; just not best friends. unfortunately, after that meeting, P took the hint and now fully avoids me. i look through my phone at the year we spent together and it makes me want to laugh until i'm crying or cry until i'm sobbing. because she truly lit up my 8th grade year up until that point and i'm just disappointed that she's so weird about those views. i miss her so much, and i'm beginning to think ignorance was bliss, and that if i never found out i wouldn't be as sad as i am about all of it now.

obviously, that doesn't excuse how she acts around A or in general. but she seriously was the best friend ever for a while and i'm not sure what to do about it.

I'm starting high school in barely 4 months, and I am going into freshman year with zero friends. Not exaggerating, I haven't had a single real friend since last year (excluding my toxic/abusive one and her group that leaves me out of EVERYTHING, and even they aren't going to the same high school as me). The thought of going in to high school is already terrifying to me, let alone going there not knowing anybody. All I want in high school is a big, fun group of friends that will help me enjoy my high school years and support me through everything, people I can laugh with and talk to about whatever I need.

The problem is, I've had trouble with social interactions my whole life. At some points, my family thought I had autism or some kind of social issues, because personally I think I'm good at talking to people, but I can never keep friends and have a hard time connecting with new people. It's not like I'm a quiet person, at least not so much anymore; I'm able to put myself out there and talk to people, but I always feel like I'm weirding them out or making a terrible first impression. When I do manage to connect with people, they're never really what I'm looking for; they're too quiet, too mean, have too different of humor, etc., and all I want is friends who are like me and people I can connect with. How am I supposed to get better at making friends and being confident in talking to people? How do I improve my social skills?

Okay, so there's this boy I've been talking to recently. We've been "friends" (AKA people who share friends so we would hang out once in a blue moon) for a long time but we didn't really talk that much until the past couple weeks. The thing is, I can't tell if he likes me or not. We text every day and have super funny conversations, and there has been a tiny bit of flirting (unless i'm just reading it wrong). I have kind of started to like him because he's funny and sweet and he's a really good guy. The only thing that keeps throwing me off is that he keeps asking me to "put him on with someone" and won't shut up about girls. Other than that, he starts conversations with me regularly, and even when we start on topics like school or other people, he always continues the conversation and asks me a bunch of questions, flirts with me, and I really don't know if he just wants to be close friends like that or if he's really trying to start something. If anyone needs more info I can answer questions, but do you think he likes me or nah??