u/Against0dds

You either lie about it and people don't understand why you are the way you are, or you be upfront about your condition and they judge you or in some cases, immediately turn away. There's no winning here. I've been trying to find friends online in various different subreddits and it hasn't been going great so far. Is making new friends impossible? How do you even make friends with someone anymore? I'm always honest. Maybe to a fault. But after going through so much in the past few months, I can't even lie about how I'm feeling when someone asks me how I've been. I'll tell them it hasn't been going great then they'll ask why. I'll answer them honestly and then they'll think I'm too emotional or too sad for them to be friends with. I just don't know anymore. I just want a friend so badly without having to worry about them secretly judging me or worry about the thought of them leaving. This just sucks.

I feel like it's very easy for me to just spill everything and tell everything about myself to someone who gives me an okay. They'd ask me about my problems and when I tell them it's heavy, they'll assure me they'll handle it. Or if they tell me to be honest, I'll be honest. But I feel everytime that I do, it just never goes well. I feel I should have more boundaries. More walls. But as soon as someone tries reaching out, those walls immediately shatter as I begin trusting them out of a sense of any kindness I feel. And it hurts all the more when it's because of that honesty and because of that trust is when they start to feel uncomfortable despite saying otherwise. Am I alone in this? Am I just too gullible for my own good?

I tried so many times now. I DMed about a dozen people so far and have not gotten a single reply from any of them. It really feels like no one wants to talk to me. I'm feeling so alone. I have no one to talk to. I can't handle being like this anymore. Idk if it's just because of my bpd expecting a reply so quickly but they haven't replied or even looked at my message for a day now. Idk if it's because I'm a guy who only wants to talk to girls and they think I'm gonna be weird or creep on them, but this just really sucks.

Been trying to make friends with people on here without much luck. Interested to be friends with people who I can talk to a lot. Doesn't have to be everyday. Just someone who's a consistent chatter. I like going on calls with people. Breaks the ice a lot quicker and would be easier for us to get to know each other. I'm into gaming, anime, manga, and movies but mostly gaming. We can talk about things outside of that though. I'm usually a good conversationalist and I like hearing stories from people as I can be a good listener. I yap a lot but I also love being yapped to. Just no guys please. I just can't talk to guys if you'd understand.

I made friends with this girl in college when I was still studying. We were really close and she was really the only person I talked to outside of school. But some time later she decided to just ignore my texts. I didn't care about it when she ignored my messages. Maybe she was just busy as you are in college. But it's when I got to school is when I noticed something was wrong. I tried speaking to her and get her attention and she wouldn't even budge. I thought maybe she was just in a bad mood and I laughed it off. The next day I went to school, she was still ignoring me. Now I'm just confused. Then the next day, we were at the library and she was sitting alone, and I tried talking to her again. And still, she would ignore me. I tried getting her to explain and tell me why but nothing. It's then I realized that she no longer wishes to speak to me and it hurts. It may be cuz I was crushing on her or being weird, but it's a different kind of hurt to be ignored intentionally in person. Idk if this is a unique case, but has anyone ever been ignored to their face by their friends? I just wanna know.

I met this girl a few months ago on Discord through an NSFW server. And while our meeting was out of the ordinary, we were able to become really good friends despite it. We talked everyday for 3 months and thought I had made a friend for life. She was very private about her personal info, but we were close enough to have told each other our real names only after a few months of knowing each other and I know enough about her to know who she really is. But through my behavior and actions like trying to talk to her everyday and falling for her, she decided to remove me in her life and sent 1 final goodbye message as she had deleted her Discord account.

I was destroyed by it and tried my hardest to find her again. Through countless attempts I did manage to find her other accounts and while it is creepy of me, I just wanted to see her again even from afar. After a few weeks, I wrote her a message telling her sorry and extended my hand again to reach out to her. She did see my message but asked who I was. When I had elaborated and told her she did see them but didn't reply afterwards. Now a few months have passed and she's moved on like nothing happened and here I am still thinking about her. I still check on her from time to time but she has not given me a second thought and it just makes me so sad realizing that I was nothing to her at the end of the day. Just another person who can be easily discarded and forgotten about.

I don't even know what to say. It just sucks. For context, this is a girl I met online and she's already in a relationship at this point. First two times happened cuz of me. I will fully take blame for what had happened. But she forgave me and I forgave her. But the third time I just know it's because of her boyfriend. She had just reached out to me again a few hours ago and we were talking like normal until she disappeared again. From what I've heard, he saw one of my messages pop up one time and he tried to stop us from talking. So she blocked me from most of her accounts. Idk how much control her bf has over her accounts or if she was just with him at the time of this blocking but he definitely noticed us talking earlier. This time however, she went full scorched earth. She deleted her accounts and privated most. Idk what to do. Idk if I'll get to talk to her again.

It really feels like I'm being lead on to a false sense of security with each friend I've made online. I always wanna be upfront with them about my mental health and what I'm going through and every time they assure me that they'll understand and will try not to take things personally and communicate with me as best they can. And when I felt safe and secured is always when things go wrong. 3 friendships in, and all have left me. Even though I try to be honest, or I try to be communicative, it seems with online friends that if you ever do 1 or 3 things wrong, they're going to leave you. And I hate feeling like my actions are being kept on a checklist. I know I'm a flawed person, but I also know that all of these frienships I've made have all been really good and fun for us all with very few arguments or disagreements. It's just those little mistakes that ruin the whole thing and I hate how we never get to talk it out. I know I'm clingy and easily attached, but surely they should understand and try and reason with me first instead of leaving immediately right?