r/massage

Hello! I just got a massage for my first mother's day, a prenatal massage. During my massage is felt like the masseuse was distracted, not talking to me, asking if everything felt okay. Just regular small check-ins I'm used to getting massages. The massage felt distracted if that makes any sense? I see she has a headphone in and can hear a little noise coming out of it. No big deal to me I figured, maybe she's just listening to a podcast or audio book. Then she turns me over and I realize she's watching TV from her phone. She then proceeds to go back over to the table and at the end I realize she's eating a container of pudding. She ends the massage by saying okay carefull getting off the table and walks out. I tipped 18 % I usually tip 20 %. But I came out just feeling really disappointed. I don't want to give the establishment a bad review, but is it fair to message the management privately and let them know? This place is a wellness spa and has great revies in general. Or is it being dramatic ​saying something?

update:

I called and spoke with the manager. She apologized profusely and was very kind. She appreciated how I handled it and said the situation was not okay. She has me coming back in on them with a different massage therapist and plans on speaking with the masseuse. Thank you guys for the advice! I'm a slowly getting better at advocating for myself!

First time ever posting to Reddit, wasn’t sure where else to go with this. Went for a massage today, 90 minute session. I had never had a traditional Chinese massage before so in doing some research beforehand it seemed like typically the massage is done either with clothes on or over a sheet. when I got in she asked for payment first which already was a red flag and she left the room, didn’t tell me to get undressed or get on the bed or anything. I stood around for five minutes waiting for her to come back when she came back she seemed a bit confused that I wasn’t on the bed and asked if I was ready. I said oh sorry I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to undress or how to be ready, you didn’t tell me. she spoke basically no English, which is fine, but I feel like if you’re gonna be doing a service like this, you need to be able to at least express the basics in English. She told me to lay down on the bed and started taking my clothes off for me, which felt really uncomfortable. Then throughout the whole massage, she kept pulling the sheet up my butt so my whole butt was just thong out exposed. later she opened the door so I was just on the bed butt out, door open. I don’t think anyone could see if they walked by, but I’m not sure. then later on in the massage some other woman comes in. They’re talking saying something in Chinese. She tells me I’m beautiful and that I have beautiful skin and told me I looked young, too young and asked if I was a teenager to which I said no because I’m not. then throughout the session she kept stretching me in ways I didn’t even know I could be stretched. It was starting to feel uncomfortable. My body is not that flexible. One of the last things she did was a stomach massage which I was turned Face up and I was covered for, but multiple times my breasts were exposed because while she was massaging, the sheet was moving. Then when we finished, they asked if I want tea which I said yes to. she sits down with me while I’m drinking tea tries to chat with me, but again she doesn’t speak any English, so everything I said she kind of just laughed at. Then proceeds to make me pull up the review page and presses the five stars for me and almost seemed like she was gonna sit there and watch me write the review. thankfully she left so I just deleted the review and put my phone away. Makes sense now why they have such high reviews. I don’t know, I feel like the massage was nice and maybe I’m just used to bigger corporations, and Swedish massage. I used to work at Hand and Stone and they’re very on top of making sure people are draped correctly so they’re not feeling over exposed. She also kept hugging me and told me she was so happy to do the massage for me. She seemed nice and I made it out alive, definitely when the second person came in and told me I had beautiful skin, I wasn’t exactly sure if I was gonna make it out. I definitely felt very exposed the whole time and not really sure what to do. Is this normal traditional Chinese massage massages??

So I feel really embarrassed having to come on here and ask this but I feel like if I don’t calm down my nerves the massage will just be pointless.

So I got me and my mom massage vouchers for Mother’s Day and our appointment is tomorrow, it’s a 60 minute Swedish massage with a 30 minute foot massage. This is no way my first massage as I’ve been getting them at least once or twice a year for the last 4 years but this is the first time I’m on my period when I’ll be having one. And one of the main issues that I’m nervous about is I don’t like tampons, they’ve always been uncomfortable to me and especially when I have a light flow like I do now, I prefer panty liners. Is it fine to go get a massage while wearing a panty liner? Should I suck it up and use a tampon for the hour and a half? If I do use a panty liner or even if I don’t and I do use a tampon should I give the person doing my massage a heads up that I’m on my period? I’m not a very comfortable person with talking about things like my period so it would definitely be embarrassing for me but I also don’t want to make whoever is doing it uncomfortable either so I’d push aside that embarrassment.

I’m curious how other massage therapists handle the emotional side of this work over time. Not even difficult clients necessarily, just the constant energy exchange and being fully present with people all day. I’ve noticed there are weeks where I leave work feeling grounded and connected, and other weeks where I feel completely wiped out even if my body feels physically fine.

I was talking to a friend about this and realized most people outside the field think massage is relaxing for the therapist too, which made me laugh a little. They don’t really see the focus it takes hour after hour. I’m wondering if this is something you learned to manage better with experience or if it just comes in waves depending on your schedule and clients.

Do you have small routines that help you reset between sessions or after work? Not looking for perfect wellness answers, just real things that help you not carry everyone home mentally at the end of the day.

Hi everyone.. today I had a massage session with a professional massage therapist.. the massage was amazing..but the therapist was wearing gloves.. and the feeling was strange.. like plastic rubber scratching my skin..is it usual.?.has it ever happened to you? He was really good and I want to go again..but how to tell him..

It's been 3 years since I've had a massage and I treated myself yesterday to a 60 minute deep tissue massage. I used to get them fairly regularly but life got busy. The massage was absolutely wonderful. He used the perfect amount of pressure, no pain, and released a ton of tightness I've been holding in my neck and shoulders. For the first time in a year my neck has no pain at all. I made sure to drink water afterward. A few hours later I suddenly felt very nauseous and threw up. Afterward I felt fine. Today I feel exhausted and my bowels have moved a bit...faster.. than is typical. I don't feel like I'm sick. I did also start my period yesterday so I don't know if it's a contributing factor. Could a massage cause this?

I been driving trucks 🚚 about 8 years and since I started I been having lower back pain and mild pain in hips due to sitting so long and jumping in & out the truck. I started doing massages as alternate to chiropractor. I at first wasn't comfortable getting that area touched but one therapist convinced me to let them do it because it's all connected they said. Sure enough I felt great afterwards so I figured I will try to do this as part of my regular massages going forward. I go to another massuese and they didn't really work on my glute area at all and I didn't say anything because I felt it would of been weird or idk how to ask that without idk thinking it's coming off as weird. I don't want a massuese to get the wrong idea or anything I'm literally just trying to feel better for few weeks until I need my next massage. Idk maybe im overthinking things.

I’ve been curious about how other massage therapists navigate this because it feels like such a subtle skill compared to the physical side of the work.

I’ve noticed some clients come in wanting a super quiet, almost meditative session one week, then the next appointment they want to chat the entire time about work, relationships, vacations, everything. I actually enjoy both kinds of sessions, but reading the room can feel tricky sometimes, especially with newer clients.

Do you usually let the client fully lead the tone of the session, or do you have your own approach for setting the energy early on? I’ve started paying more attention to how people answer intake questions because it weirdly tells you a lot about whether they want conversation or space.

The more I learn about massage, the more I realize how much of the job is emotional awareness and communication, not just technique. Curious how other people balance being warm and present without accidentally overtalking or going too silent.

My current massage therapist is moving and I’m thrilled for her because she has wanted to move for a long time. She will be missed 😭

She‘s incredibly intuitive and just knows how much pressure to apply and where the discomfort originates.

Being that I will be in the market for another massage therapist, how do I convey that I don’t always know where pain originates and that I also appreciate silent appointments? It is quiet time for me to just be and not share what I’m going through.

I can be very direct and do not want to hurt feelings yet I admit to wanting no conversations so I can process and not share whats going on. This caused tension with a former hairstylist so that is why I ask.

Hi all, I get married Sunday, 5/24 and I’m thinking about getting a lymphatic drainage massage. I’ve never done one before. I also know that I’ll be drinking on the Friday and Saturday before the wedding. When would be the best time to get the massage? I was thinking the Wednesday before but wondering if it will be impactful if I do it that early? Any and all advice would be helpful. Thank you!

I work at Massage Envy and have 2 shirts and pants. I wash them every week and bathe regularly, have good hygiene during my 4 day workweek and change my underwear everyday.

At times I work in a room that can get quite warm and I sweat a lot when I do deep tissue.

I've wiped my pits in between sessions, use the fan and room spray , yet I have noticed I can smell my sweat and its not good.

Noone has said anything, but I know if I can smell myself others probably can too.

I dont want to use antiperspirant because quite frankly its not healthy for my long-term health just for working in a small dark room once a week.

Im searching for a moisture wicking undershirt that may help with odor, but I wanted to ask here if anyone has recommendations for this dilemma... and if you know of a good quality undershirt that can keep me dry but also prevent odor.

Im considering a merino wool undershirt but not sure what is good material to choose.

Ive also brought my own deodorant to work etc.. doing what I can, but any help is greatly appreciated.

Thank you.

I’ve been going to a massage clinic for a while now and lately I’ve been choosing a time (90 min massage) that is preferable to me when I schedule online.

Often times the front desk person will text me asking if I can reschedule to a time that is better for the therapists schedule. My guess is that the time I’m picking is in the middle of the therapists block of time so if I move it later or earlier it would be better for them because maybe then they can squeeze in another client. But The other times are not convenient for me.

Should I feel bad about not moving the time? If they really didn’t want people to pick that time then they should just not let people choose that time period in my opinion. Or only that option opens up when someone has chosen the times around that block of time. I’m sure some software out there can do that time management.

Hello, I have a question! I had a massage at a 4 diamond star hotel and spa. The massage therapist placed my items (swimsuit/robe) on my back after my session while still laying on the table. I have had massages before and even at this specific spa but never had this happen. I felt it was disrespectful especially since I couldn't find a piece of my swimsuit and had to open the door to ask the therapist. Is this a practice I don't know about? Just felt disrespectful did not appreciate having to ask where my items where when they fell off on the other side of the table.

so, my spa is a destination, spa, we have hot tubs, and cold plunge and massage services. It turns out that my boss made it so the front of house gets tips for the water journey, so if my client goes to the water journey and comes to me, the tip can be divided by the water journey attendant, and the massage therapist. Is this fair?

It’s my first massage job out of school and so far it’s been kind of a whirlwind with a lot of things going wrong and being told one thing and then being the other.

i don’t know what to do, because that’s where a lot of our tips come from and the front of house doesn’t do anything to really get a tip… So I don’t understand why they implemented this to where now you can select an amount and 20% of the tip will go to the therapist in 20% will go to the water journey attendant, even if they didn’t do anything and it’s my money :(

any advice would be appreciated lol

Hi everyone! I usually go to Massage Envy, so it kind of varies who I get depending on the day although I do have some favorites. I’m starting with a new person this week who I’ve never had before.
I ran into an issue with the lady who has done the last few of mine. Where is a lot of talk and a lot of asking me questions. Hasn’t really gotten the hint with my one word answers, or even not replying.
With my guy this weekend, is it considered rude to say straight up that I prefer not to talk? Or is there a freezing that you like better?
I really don’t want to be rude and I like chatting before and after, but when I’m getting a massage, I really prefer to just lock in, you know? I have relaxing little stories in my head that I like to play through, not talk but I don’t wanna be a dick :(

I need a decent paying job, right now I'm looking into (probably life long) work as a cna , but that doesn't pay much. Would i make decent money working at a spa?

I’ve been seeing my current massage therapist for a couple months. She’s my favorite out of any I’ve ever seen. She’s a very sweet woman too, and the last few times, she’s given me a hug afterwards, which I haven’t minded up until this point. Unfortunately, I got raped a few days ago, and as a result I don’t think I feel totally comfortable with hugs from most people for at least the short term. I do want to continue getting massages though. Is there a diplomatic way to ask her if we can skip the hug the next few times? I don’t want to offend her because like I said she’s my favorite, and idk if I want to tell her that the reason is because I was raped, because I feel like that might be TMI.

I want to start the process but it seems overwhelming. LMBT for 6 years and I'm considering working for myself but I've been contracting with a small business and I'm not sure how many regulars would follow me if I left (I signed a non-soliciting agreement and dont want to risk anything or ruin the relationship I have with the owner). I just got diagnosed with vocal dystonia and the treatments/ insurance are expensive and im afraid of not being able to afford these things if I leave, and I would be fired if I tried to slowly faze out. I know working with insurance has drawbacks but if you have any tips I'd love to hear them.

Hi there - would love feedback on this, although worth mentioning I am only just starting a massage therapy program now, so very newbie here. It’s a career pivot, and I also teach yoga. I would love to turn a spare bedroom into a massage/spa room, or even provide outdoor options if I can get the right set up. Just curious how this has panned out for those of you who’ve tried it, and what I should consider? I really want to set myself up to make the most $$$ possible. Any tips or anecdotes or ideas appreciated! Also glad to know if this is a bad idea with a whole bunch of downsides I don’t know about.

And I’d also love to hear about collaborations that work well, if you have suggestions there!

Thanks so much in advance!