r/islam

Nothing I will write down is something I am proud of, do not make my mistakes.

5years ago, I was dating this girl for 3 years, I was her first. One year in, we did it. It then became a daily thing. Fast forward to two year after that.

The relationship got toxic, but we were planning to go to france to continue our studies, we went through the process together, the language test, campus france visa process and all of that. I got accepted and received my visa, she did not. It was sad but she was supportive and happy for me. Summer is here, and it was our last few months living together. As I mentioned before, getting sexual is a daily thing, sometimes protected, sometimes not, but generally, we're taking precautions. Time has came, I went back to my city to spend my last month with my family, she stayed in hers living alone.

Before moving out, I noticed that her period were late but we didn't pay much attention as it sometimes happen. 1week after moving out, she texted me she did a pregnancy test and it's positive. literally. I remember I couldn't even walk when I read the message. She then said she will do a blood test. A few days after, she said It's confirmed, she is pregnant.

I didn't know what to do, from one side, I see that I finally reach a dream of living abroad and it's getting destroyed last moment, from another side I see my girlfriend is pregnant with my child. I was in a very tight spot so I told her that I need to see the results because she may be lying, she refused to send me any pictures or proof and kept saying' I can't be in this alone and u should take responsibility. A few days have passed I told her I can't have a child I am not able to be a dad yet as I don't have money for him, abort it. After a lot of talking crying and screaming, she agreed on the condition that I will pay for everything. She did it and she called me crying saying I will never forgive you and what I did is all you and you will be punished by allah. I said okay sorry I hope you will get better then we never talked again.

5years have passed, I still live in france, was about to get married and didn't, had many problems in here and facing many challenges. But there is one thing that keeps me awake at night, the abortion I did, it's eating me out alive, the guilt I feel almost every night from knowing that I have killed my own child of 3-5weeks, will allah ever forgive me, will I go to hell, will my child be there waiting for me to be punished. It's very aweful and I don't know what to do. A mistake I made in the past is making me even think that I don't deserve to have children ever.

Please make dua for me. I have to make use of this month to succeed in returning to Allah. I'm afraid if I let this slip by me, I'll never find the straight path again.

Sometimes it's easy to stay sinful and heedless because I don't have to acknowledge the wrong I've done. I'm very good at not taking accountability but I want to do better. I want to find the commitment I had when I first said my shahada.

Hello all, I am seeking support as I am extremely distressed right now and i have no idea what to do. I am a revert muslim and am still closeted, I practice in secret because my parents hate Islam. I am going to university this year and have chosen to live in Masjid housing, since this saves costs and will support me in my faith (family doesn't know I've chosen this). I am going to move in after about 2 months but I fear the reaction of my father who especially hates Islam and screamed at me when he suspected I may be practicing a while back, (They are strict Christians, and I still live with them) On top of this, I am also afraid of fitting in as a white muslim revert. Any advice would be appreciated as I am in constant distress and don't know what to do.

I’m a Christian currently trying to learn about Islam, and I’ve been reading the Quran with an open mind. I’m halfway through, but I’ve been struggling with some of the passages about Hell and God’s mercy, and I wanted for clarification respectfully.

Some verses describe Hell in extremely harsh ways: people begging for mercy or another chance, being told they will not receive it, and descriptions of eternal punishment and skin burning that honestly disturb me. At the same time, the Quran repeatedly describes God as “the Most Merciful” and “the Most Forgiving.”

I’m having difficulty reconciling those two ideas. Personally, I struggle to see how eternal punishment could ever be justified, especially if someone sincerely desired redemption after experiencing consequences. Christianity has always said that Hell is the human choice to live away from God, and that God’s mercy stays open to anyone who genuinely repents, even in Hell.

Islam seems logical but the portrayal of God in some of these passages feels far more severe and less forgiving than what I’m used to in Christianity. I’m genuinely trying to understand. Am I interpreting these verses correctly, or is there a better interpretation for these passages?

Thank you to anyone willing to explain thoughtfully.

I'm really just going on about Islam, and my relationship with a muslim man as a Latina Woman. I hope the questions I have at the end could be answered. Any advice would help to.

A bit before Ramadan started (2-3 months before) I decided to buy a Quran. The reason is because since I've met this muslim man (currently seeing) he tells me about his religion. No, he does not try to convince/force me to convert and I do not plan to. He talks about how he prays 5 times a day, I have seen and heard his prayers though I do not understand what it is he is saying when praying in Arabic. Every now and then he talks about Islam. And I enjoy it each time and get curious about Islam.

When I had bought the Quran I tried reading it every night before bed. Of course I did not tell him about this because it was personal. It was me trying to find where my beliefs align. I didn't like the fact that I had no idea where I belonged. Always being unsure. But not even two weeks passed after buying the Quran, and I told him because I got upset over something he said. He had told me how I should start praying, and to be thankful and grateful to God for what I have. He said that it wasn't good to not believe. He said it didn't matter how I prayed but that I should just start/learn to. Did I overreact? Maybe. I was upset because it felt like he thought I wasn't grateful for what I had. As if I didn't appreciate everything I was given. I didn't and still don't know how to pray. I never once prayed, I was never shown how to. All I would do was talk to myself and hope to God that things would change. So it was that moment that I told him that I was trying to learn and understand his religion. That I was never taught to pray or shown how to. And that I had no Idea where I stood when it came to religion. He then had apologized. Saying that he had not meant it that way. That he was not saying I wasn't grateful, etc. He was a bit happy about me trying to understand/learn about his religion. But told me that if I'm forcing myself to stop. Once I told him that I wasn't forcing myself and genuinly wanted to understand he started asking all these questions. Like, what chapter I'm in. Or what my thoughts on the Quran were, and just that he was proud.

Currently, I'm only less than 50 pages in. I live with my parents, and have about 5-6 siblings. It's never quiet. And when reading the Quran I take my time because I want to learn/understand. But just being able to hear people around me while reading the Quran bothers me. Any noise does when reading. I can't focus, and each time I have to reread the sentence over and over until it's actually silent..

I read the Quran in english because well I don't know arabic. I'm a Latina woman who only speaks english. I don't speak spanish, but I can understand a lot of it. I grew up with grandparents only speaking to me in spanish growing up because that's all they knew. But I would only ever reply back to them in english, and again they'd just talk/reply back to me in spanish. Everyone else would speak to me both in English abd Spanish.

I have always believed in God. My family is all Christian. From my fathers side, to my mothers side. All believing that Jesus is God. Not a single one of them is not Christian. So when it comes to religion, religion scares me. It was after my younger siblings asked me "Do you believe that Jesus is God?" and I replied back saying "No." and then them saying things like "You're stupid." "Going to hell" etc. that I chose to ignore them when speaking about religion. I never spoke about my thoughts on religion because I never knew. All I believed was that God is real. And that God is God. Nothing less and nothing more.

Since the month of Ramadan I tried/chose to stop eating pork. Of course I did by accident eat pork on Ramadan once or twice. But since I haven't eaten pork. My family doesn't know this, and I try to not make it obvious. Each time my Father makes anything including pork I ignore it, eat whatever is on the side slowly (not including whats touched the pork) until everyone leaves. Once everyone is gone I'll put it in the microwave, and let someone have it or feed it to my dog.

I feel I'll be judged for certain if they knew I stopped eating pork. Saying "Is it because of that man that you've stopped eating pork?" "It's because of him isn't it?" I've already been told that a few times by my aunt, and it upsets/bothers me. Because why can't it just be that I don't like or want to eat pork. Why does it have to be because of him. Pork has always been my least favorite. The smell of pork bothers me, and it has a strange taste. So it was never that hard to stop eating it. By the way he has met my family already. So my family does know he's muslim, doesn't eat pork, shouldn't be dating, etc. So they assume that the changes would be due to him.

This man has met most of my family, and I have not met any of his. He has spoke about me to his siblings. But not his parents. We do not know what will happen if his parents were to know that he is with a woman not of Islam.

This man wants to get married after he is done with Uni. (1 year). While I have 2-3 years of Uni. He's a good man. A great man. The only man I've been with. And I know I'm the only one he's been with and treated this way, and just sexually touched (not to that point). Were both virgins. And wants us to be each others first as soon as possible. At first when he had touched me sexually he felt really guilty, and left. To him it was wrong. He's tried to stop thinking about it, and letting it get to him. But it still gets to him and he's also given it weeks of thinking. His final decision was that he was ready. Ready to lose his virginity with me. Said that he wouldn't regret it, nor feel guilty about it. That he wouldn't blame me or take anything out on me. That I want to be the woman he marries, and that it's what he plans to do.
Also, he has asked me if our children could be muslim and I said yes. Because I have no problem with our children being muslim.

What I want to ask is if there is hope for the two of us. Would his parents allow it? accept the two of us?

For muslim men with non muslim woman. Did your parents/family accept? If not what did you do?

Where exactly do I stand when it comes to religion? Because I have no clue. When it comes to Islam I feel like I wouldn't be considered muslim if I'm not wearing a hijab. If I'm not praying multiple times a day. As for clothing I don't go around wearing revealing clothes, showing off skin. I wear leggings everyday. It's just what I wear daily due to comfort. But I hear that skin tight clothes are not modest as they show off your body, curves, etc. I do as well want to marry this man, and to me he does seem serious.

What if we become each others first, and he just up and goes? Could I just be falling for sweet words? (Been together 6-7 months). He does deal with things at home and might have a few red flags but nothing too serious. Somethings he does do bother me, but when I tell him he does fix it. It goes both ways. When I do something he doesn't like or needs fixing then he'll let me know and I'll fix it.

These past few days I've been making Dua or trying to atleast. But unsure of whether I am doing it right Every night when going to sleep I make Dua. I'll get in bed right after a shower (12-2 a.m.) and a long day of work/studies. I'll close my eyes, hold my hands together, because it's comfortable and basically whisper to myself. I'll talk/pray in english and start by saying how I am thankful for everything Allah has given me. That I should be thankful/grateful, and appreciate what I have. Then I'd go on saying "Allah I pray that you protect..." and just vent. While doing so I do usually cry but then with no intention of falling asleep until I finish my prayer I by accident fall asleep for a minute or two with tears still on my face. Then I'd wake up, continue talking, somehow fall asleep for another minute or two. Then wake up and just try to end my prayer quickly by thanking allah again for everything and just saying Good night. Because I can't help/stop myself from falling asleep. But, I don't know if I'm making dua right. I don't recite anything from the Quran because I don't remember nor have I read much.

I took Shahadah

And the feeling I had was I felt like was coming against everything I was raised with.

But did anyone experience the shaking feeling inside : nervousness feeling when they took the declaration .

I just gotta get connected to people and a masjid

Also I’m now being downlow about it and at this time I haven’t told anyone else coz I’m still part of a church and live with church people too.

Give me time once I learn tho.

Allhumdulillah to everyone.

Hello everyone, I dont know if this is the right place. just making this post here as im in desperate need of duas right now. I cant say much without giving context, but things have been bad for a while. I have committed alot of sins and I think they are coming back to me, my life is at the lowest point right now to the point where the only thing stopping me from kms is the fact that I want to have the chance of asking for forgiveness and being a good muslim before dying. I have no one, absolutely no one to make dua for me. Please stop by for a minute and make dua things get better for me, may Allah reward you for it. I never thought I'd have to make a post like this but here I am 🙏

After yesterday's shooting I believe it is very important for Muslims to legally arm themselves for protection as a way to deter lunatics from attacking a masjid. After Christchurch I bought my first gun and encouraged family and friends to practice this right as well. Now I am thinking that there should be a 2nd Amendment workshop at local masjids to teach congregants about this right as allowed to the local laws as well as first aid training. Many of the crazies in this society view us as both a "scary threat" and weak. This view has emboldened them to bully and dehumanize us. Alhamdullilah there was a guard that prevented this from being worse.

What I pray for is a change in perception of how we are viewed in this society. If many people know that we are practicing the 2nd Amendment in high numbers then this will make anyone that wants to threaten Muslims think twice and also will build respect in our neighbor's eyes.

I just want to know what everyone else thinks about this and if there are already similar workshops at your masjid. May Allah SWT accept the Shuhadah and keep us all safe. Ameen.

https://preview.redd.it/wdbikzac062h1.png?width=766&format=png&auto=webp&s=f2b26107bc1221b8713eed43701d9e7ab0dcf2f1

My heart and prayers go out to the community. Ahl al-Kitab stand with you.

I’m posting this because I honestly just need to get my thoughts out and hear other people’s perspectives.

I was raised in a Muslim household and I still believe in God and have faith in a lot of Islamic principles. But I wouldn’t say I currently practice in a very traditional or strict way.

Lately I’ve been struggling a lot mentally with fear around religion, identity, and family expectations. I feel like I’m constantly caught between what I personally feel and believe, and what my family and community expect from me.

A big part of my anxiety is the fear of “failing” religiously or being judged for not practicing in the “correct” way, and that sometimes spirals into fear about what that means for my future or afterlife. At the same time, I don’t feel like my current environment allows me to explore my beliefs in a calm or personal way without pressure.

Another major struggle for me is marriage and cultural expectations. My family expects me to marry within my religion and culture, but I’m currently in a relationship with someone outside of that (he is Dominican Catholic). What’s making it even more confusing is that I feel emotionally safe and respected in that relationship, which makes me question a lot of things I was taught to prioritise.

I feel stuck between:
- my own feelings and experiences
- my fear of disappointing my family
- and the expectations of my community

I’m not trying to disrespect anyone’s beliefs or argue about religion. I’m just trying to understand how other people have dealt with similar conflicts between faith, identity, love, and family pressure.

If anyone has experienced something similar or has any advice on how to think through this without spiralling, I would really appreciate hearing it.