u/ramp_A_ger

I saw a post on this about how your experience as a kid in school was, and most of the responses were pretty non neurotypical - either they were bullied in school or didn't have friends.

Having a bad experience in your childhood or being neurodivergent doesn't mean you're gonna end up FA, but if you're FA and had these experiences, it corrobarotes it or sort of explains it.

Personally, idk where i belong. I consider myself neurotypical, basically had a normal childhood, have a social life, no issue with making friends etc. But I am still FA, get no likes on apps, nothing irl. The only "non-typical" aspect is I've got a pretty severe stutter but I'm sure I'd be FA even without it.

I'm pretty confident that if I met a 1000 women on a date, I could find someone easily, but do I get to go on a single date - No

Even irl, i barely get to meet new women, let alone women who want to spend time with me, despite following conventional normie advice. I'm socially active but romantically invisible.

My questions to everyone is

1. Are there a lot of people on this who're basically neurotypical - No obvious reason to be FA, but unfortunately are FA?

2. If you actually got the opportunity to go on a 1000 dates or met 1000 people in your life - would you still remain FA?

3. What's your reason for being FA (assuming it exists) If yes, is fixable or it's beyond your control (say logistics, or looks or your wiring). If no, please mention that too.

In my case, I can't pinpoint any single reason why I'm FA except that fact that i don't get dates or get to meet people or the people I meet don't show romantic interest at all. But there's gotta be some reason since the evidence points that I'm FA while people around me are not

By all statistical measures i shouldn't be FA but yet I am.

Hello!

Not sure if this is the right sub, but this felt the most relevant.

Quick intro - 25M, working, doing okay in life overall. I’m not specifically asking about arranged marriage, more just some thoughts/questions that have been on my mind lately.

I’ve been single all my life despite not wanting to be. I’ve tried most conventional advice - apps, meeting people through classes/hobbies, better pictures, gym, socializing more etc... but honestly nothing has worked. I literally get 0 likes on apps or interest in real life since years. Initially I thought maybe apps are just bad in general, but then I see so many friends getting dates/relationships from them, so clearly they work for some people.

What confuses me is that I’m not some extremely antisocial person either. I have female friends, can talk normally, and people generally see me as decent/normal. I just never seem to generate romantic interest.

At one point I thought maybe it’s just looks. But then I look around and see people from all ranges of looks in relationships, so even that explanation stopped making sense after a while.

I’m not here to complain or blame anyone. I know nobody owes me a relationship. I guess I’m just trying to understand where people like me eventually end up.

I know 25 is still young, but slowly I’m realizing that maybe finding someone on my own is unlikely. Back in school/college most people around me were single too, but now almost everyone I know has had at least some relationship or romantic experience, while I still have absolutely none.

And honestly, at this point I’m not even actively trying anymore. Not in a bitter way, I just got mentally exhausted after years of effort and getting absolutely no interest. If I was still single despite at least getting some dates that's reasonable. So now I mostly focus on work, hobbies, friends and life in general.

Realistically I’ll probably look at arranged marriage around 28, mainly because it at least creates opportunities to meet people intentionally. But even that feels strange sometimes - how does someone who has been single all life suddenly jump into marriage? How does someone suddenly show interest in you when you've never had anyone show any interest all your life?

And honestly, arranged marriage itself doesn’t seem easy either. I know some of my brother’s friends in their 30s who’ve also been single all life and tried arranged marriage, but they’re still single currently. So sometimes that scares me too.

Honestly idk exactly what I’m asking here. Maybe just wanted to hear from people who were in similar situations. What happened eventually? Did things work out later? Or did you eventually make peace with being single?

Would genuinely appreciate honest perspectives.