u/plarkimier

i got to take a WATER TAXI to an island for work today. my coworkers and bosses are so fun and motivated in the field of work and it's a joy to work with them. on the boat ride back, i kept getting thrown about in the cabin by the waves and we all just couldn't stop laughing. this job is a light in what's been a hard many months for me. i feel so blessed to have found it. spaghetti with bolognese sauce

woah dude. i mean yeah ok. uh. good god

fried rice with tomatoes, egg, and broccoli topped with a fried egg and some frank's hot sauce

-vent-
ever since i came out as trans my mother has constantly been negging and questioning my transition. if the topic turns to anything about me being trans (top dysphoria, starting T, gender expression, etc) she'll always have something to combat my choice. "won't you go bald? are you sure you wanna do a second puberty? that sounds awful! i don't want you to change!" always framed as being supportively curious or joking around. she always makes sure to emphasize how badly SHE doesn't want ME to change PHYSICALLY. i can't wrap my head around it. she worries so much about my appearance for someone who supposedly supports me 100% however i choose to look. i'll always happily explain the facts to her, but she almost always pushes back. she tells me things about trans people that are blatantly untrue and always uses her trans guy friend as an example of why i SHOULDN'T start T. it's really disrespectful and it always spawns a sour taste in my mouth when she brings him up, because i know she's about to use him as a trans comparison/inquiry. i have nothing against the guy, but i've never met him and i doubt he'd appreciate half the things she tells me about him to try and relate to me. she never supports my wish to get top surgery and always says i'll regret it if i have biological kids, which is fully out of the question for me and non-negotiable. she has a very specific dream for how im going to live my adult life and im nowhere near being on that road. she won't say it outright, but she'll make little jokes about it and say that she'll "try" to get over the changes i'll go through on T. it's always through indirect comments and nasty looks. but it comes from a place of motherly concern, that's all. she just doesn't want me to make a mistake that i regret! it'll be my mistake to make, my mistake to fix. this is for me. she does not accept me, even though she believes she does. it doesn't change the fact that i love her, and it doesn't change the fact that im a young man.

i didn't realize we took the recreation of smiling friends characters in other people's games as seriously as we do LOL but anyways. i love my little dudes and i love drawing them mostly pim. i love you pim pimling

i also love this guy. heheh look at him hahah . lol he's tiny pink