u/notzoro69

Porn really destroyed my relationships.

I wasn't able to go out to any gathering. I wasn't able to meet my own family members. I felt genuinely frightened... because I just couldn't see women normally anymore. Whoever I saw, my mind would just go back to those images. It was automatic. It was disturbing.

I didn't know how to control it. I didn't even know if I could recover from it.

Porn had unconsciously built a mentality in me that all women are like objects only. That was the root of my problem. It had wired my brain to constantly chase that excitement, that instant dopamine hit... and it made me see women as objects rather than people.

But then I started my NoFap journey. And along with it, I started meditating. That's when I began noticing patterns in my thinking. I realised my mind was always looking for that same excitement... even in real life. In social gatherings, when I met new people, new women, my mind was chasing that thrill. That's what was making me objectify. It was not my intention but my brain had got conditioned in that way.

It's been 2 years since I stopped watching porn. Gradually things have changed, I started seeing women more like humans again.

And through meditation, I found that the source of that excitement and joy.... is actually within me. I don't need any external stimulation for it.

Meditation helped me detach from that conditioning.

Now I'm able to distance myself from my thoughts. My relationships have improved. Those intrusive thoughts don't scare me the same way anymore.

\*"The most beautiful moments in life are moments when you are expressing your joy, not when you are seeking it."\*

\*-Sadhguru\*

I feel this quote fits perfectly here 😄

Just wanted to share this. Hope it helps someone. Thank you for reading.

TL;DR

Porn addiction distorted how I saw women and affected my relationships. After starting NoFap and meditation, I gradually detached from those patterns. Over 2 years, my thinking normalized, and I was able to improve my relationships and regain control over my mind.

I used to be really fond of motivational videos, searching for solutions and trying them out , to be honest the only advice that worked out was meditating, since then I've started to feel that whatever I need to do , I have to be involved 100% into it that's the only motivation, rest feels useless, it may have an impact for an hour or so but beyond that everything depends on the inner fire and how long one can keep it ignited.

does anyone else here feel that igniting inner fire is more important than searching for solutions outside?