u/nattiaddict

I was doing so good for 7 days. Had a whole system in place, was truly holding myself accountable, not watching any porn or sending at all.

Then last night I had to use my laptop at night to go over some lease documents for my apartment and before I knew it I was on chaturbate coughing up money for an incredibly attractive young girl.

Came ALL over myself and wanted to keep sending but stopped. For those who’ve recovered, how did you do it?

The urges tonight have been so insane. I’m laying in bed with my phone (the rule I was trying not to break) and it feels physically impossible to not tempt myself here and dip my toes in the water. I want to be manipulated, used, coerced, and psychologically trapped so badly. Why am I like this 😭

Feeling really triggered this morning. Really wanting to redownload X and look at all the rich hot brats, especially the one I’ve been sending to for years 😩

Anyone else struggling?