u/my_foreskin_is_cum

I am a 26 year old male from Sweden. I did not have the greatest start being born. Father left early, no father figure, incredible anger over this as a child, was unruly in school. High-school years were filled with drugs, alcohol and chaos.

Was put in closed psychiatric ward soon after finishing high-school. Put on heavy psychatric drugs like olanzapine and venlafaxine to manage my mental state and mood. Discharged, slowly rebuilding my life. Zombie state for 6 years because of the medicine, could not feel a thing. Started exploring christianity a bit, but felt lost.

About 1 year ago, I was home alone one night. Put on a movie, and chose Silence (2016) by Martin Scorsese. Initially I thought it would be interesting to watch a christian movie for once.

The movie captivated me. I felt emotional, a thing I had not felt in years. One of the final scenes where Jesus tells a priest that he is with him and carries his pain broke me. I cried, for the first time in 10 years. I could feel Jesus touch my heart. My soul. I could feel the inner light you spoke of, the love. I felt deeply I was loved.

A couple of months ago I saw a random Quaker meme joking about Quakers being so progressive even in the 18th century. "A random Quaker who is a feminist, anti-slavery, believes in equal rights, loves art and nature"

It resonated with me. Read up about Quakerism and found this subreddit, learned about the concept about inner light. Was chocked, as it perfectly described what I felt on that movie night about a year ago. It also made sense to me to search for god within ourselves, and to not look outwards.

Today I am the happiest I have been in ages. Found a good doctor and is slowly tapering off olanzapine and gaining back my true self, full och love and happiness. This thursday, I am going to attend my first Quaker meeting here in Sweden.

Thanks, friends, for the light, the love.

Jag har preppat en del själv hemma i tysthet. Insåg när jag läste om faktisk svensk prepping att den skiljer sig ganska fundamentalt från Amerikansk prepping-kultur. Därför tyckte jag det vore kul att skapa en svensk prepping community här på Reddit, så då gjorde jag det!

Länk: /r/hemberedskap

Gå med om ni är intresserade och vill stärka Sveriges totalförsvarsförmåga tillsammans!

Recently read in a book about psychoactive plants that Mexican prickly poppy (Argemone mexicana) was used by some native people in south america as a substitute for cannabis. They smoked it, however the book stated that the dosage and effect is not known for safe ingestion. Other sources like wikipedia state it is very poisonous.

I was wondering if anyone here has any experience with it as a psychoactive plant? Erowid seems to have no information about is as well.

Recently read in a book about psychoactive plants that Mexican prickly poppy (Argemone mexicana) was used by some native people in south america as a substitute for cannabis. They smoked it, however the book stated that the dosage and effect is not known for safe ingestion. Other sources like wikipedia state it is very poisonous.

I was wondering if anyone here has any experience with it as a psychoactive plant? Erowid seems to have no information about is as well.

I am a Swedish 26 year old with what you would maybe call high functioning autism? (Atypical is the official diagnosis I got). I feel very disconnected from my peers. I have so many ideas, deep and fun things I could share with people. Nobody seems to enjoy talking about them however. I would love to discuss philosophy, biology, spirituality, and more with people. Connect on a deeper level. But most people I meet seem to be so focused on surface level things. My brain relaxes when thinking about deeper questions and discussing things freely. I have met maybe 2 people in my life that I felt could understand me in some degree, my mother and my father.

I would describe myself as quite a free spirit, that likes to explore new ideas and viewpoints. Most people I meet however are often very close-minded and shut-inside their bubble. They also more often than not adhere to social norms that society squeezed them into.

Today, three separate friends I was going to meet up with in the week cancelled and I was just struck by this profoundly lonely feeling. It sometimes feels like almost nobody can connect with because they do not see the world as I do. It makes me sad honestly.

I've been researching the chemical compounds that are active in holy basil, and found Eugenol to be a main ingredient (70% of essential oils in some studies). I find this chemical very interesting, as it seems to have multiple good effects for the body at the lower doses ingested when for example making tea of sanctum leaves. Anesthetic properties, neuroprotective, GABA-interactive, and MAO-inhibiting. Seems to work as a sedating, mildly antidepressant compound, which explains the benefits some people get from holy basil.

Interestingly lemon balm contains eugenol as well, with many herb users praising it for its calming abilities. Anyone know more about this compound or would like to discuss?