u/minoonei

For real. I cried over her?

She treated me like shit. Gaslit tf out of me. Called me things that I should not have forgiven.

She didn't have a job. She didn't have a car. She lives with her parents. She didn't have any friends. She never went out and did things. Doesn't even pay her phone bill. Her own family hated her.

A grown ass woman. What a fucking loser. And I cried over her. I wasn't even getting the bare fucking minimum. Mad at her. And mad at myself for accepting that shit.

Good fucking riddance.

My exwBPD had made a new best friend a bit before we broke up. I could tell by the way she was talking about him that he was likely the new FP. Since there are some mutual friends on social media that we have I came across a post of hers. And im pretty sure she is hooking up with him. I had picked up vibes before the break up that something wasnt being said but I told my self I was just being jealous. I hate seeing things that confirm my suspicions were right. It definitely explains all the projection from her, and her having suspicions that I cheated (which I have never cheated on any partner in my life).

It's only been about 2 months now. I was the one that ended things. For several reasons. But the love is still there. I feel sick. And I know it's stupid but a part of me feels hurt.

I wish I never met her. I wish I had taken all the signs the universe gave me to run, to get the hell out of there. I regret putting in so much time to a relationship that caused me so many mental health issues. A relationship that dug up old wounds I had healed from. A relationship that drained every ounce of energy from me. I feel so stupid. I felt so worthless. I felt like I couldn't do anything right. I'm just barely starting to come around to feeling like there still could be a chance to meet the right person one day. But seeing that post just set me way back.