u/mariamkajaia

Hey, everyone!

I was wondering, which website would you recommend for building an online art portfolio?

I do have a domain registered to my name, but so far I've only used it to make a professional email address, and haven't connected it to an actual website.

The thing is, I want it to be as simple as possible. Easy to set up, easy to maintain, preferably free or at least somewhat on the cheaper side.

I'd love to hear your suggestions.

Thank you in advance!!

1. We met through mutual friends, he pretended not to know me MULTIPLE TIMES and asked for my name, while never telling me his (assuming that I already knew it, because he's so important, and I'm so unimportant).

2. Called me mother, multiple times, unironically, with other people present. "You're my mom" and "she's just like my mom", etc.

3. From the very beginning, he either didn't text me, texted me various ambiguous things, replied to questions with totally unrelated emojis, etc.

4. I was telling him about my childhood trauma, that my piano teacher used to hit me if I played wrong, and that's basically the reason why I haven't played since I graduated from music school. His reply was "and because of that you like being beaten during sex, right?" No, I don't. But also, what the fuck.

5. Since the day we met, he was either lying by omission, or straight up lying. The crazy part is that he lies about little insignificant things too, little lies that don't really change anything.

6. Invited me to places and never showed up.

7. Invited me somewhere, did show up, but left me in the street to go somewhere else with his friends.

8. Invited me to an event he himself was hosting, did show up, ignored me the entire night. Like, he didn't respond when I said "hi". And later through the messages he tried to brush it off as "why is this such a big deal to you?".

9. Mispronounced my name on purpose several times. The context here is that I don't like any other variations of my name, except for Mariam. He knows this. Calls me Mari anyway.

10. Intentionally fueled my preexisting eating disorder for YEARS. At first he asked me how much I weighed and pretended not to believe it when I told him. Then he literally picked me up to check if my weight was really as low as I said. Once he was showing me his scooter and I asked when he was going to take me for a ride, and he said "when you lose at least 5kgs". I weighted 38kgs at that time. Honestly, I could make a whole separate list for things he told me about my weight / appearance, but one of the most important things was him telling me that he had a kink for thin girls and that his penis didn't even work with girls who were over 45kgs. In the hindsight it all sounds so stupid, but it absolutely ruined my mental health - at some point I was outright refusing immunosuppressants, Prednisolone specifically, because I read on the internet that it causes weight gain and the thought of him not finding me attractive anymore was worse than the possibility of me literally dying.

11. He was, for years, monkeybranching between me and other women.

12. He told me, verbatim: "Mariam, when I do something and it makes you upset, don't tell me that you're upset, it's annoying".

13. Made me cry and accused me of being manipulative by crying. At first I thought he meant that I was crying on purpose to make him pity me, but no. It's worse. Apparently, he thought that I was crying on purpose in public as a threat to him. Like, if he didn't do what I wanted him to do, I was going to make people think that a man was mistreating me, which would damage his image. I still don't know where the fuck he got that from.

14. Accused me of being manipulative every single time I tried to talk about how something was making me feel. Doesn't matter if it was good or bad, talking about feelings = manipulation.

15. Made so many promises that he didn't keep.

16. Never EVER apologized for anything that actually required an apology. He does say sorry for random insignificant things all the time, but never for things that actually matter.

17. Refused to see me in public, only ever wanted to see me alone, indoors. If we accidentally met in public, best case scenario was him acknowledging my existence, which was... rare.

18. The first time I blocked him, he started stalking my friends' Instagrams with his actual real account, and whenever one of them posted a story from some place, he showed up there in like 20-ish minutes. It was actually funny, but annoying too.

19. For some ungodly reason, he follows most of my friends and relatives on Instagram. Most of them he never even met, not through me and not through other people either.

20. Once, when we weren't talking, I made a new friend and like two weeks after, he randomly texted her husband, saying "let's be friends", and started showing up whenever we hang out.

21. Did a similar thing when he was buying a house, out of all the possible real estate agencies, he chose to go to the one where one of my best friends worked, and she was the agent who actually sold him the house. (I understand that coincidences happen, but whenever we're not talking, he does stuff like this. All the time).

22. I tried to cut contact multiple times by telling him that this relationship was damaging to me and that I couldn't handle it, each and every time he guilt tripped me by saying how depressed he was and how messed up he was feeling, and how everyone left him.

23. Laughed at my drawings. I don't know what's there to laugh at, I did go to art school and I have worked as a freelance illustrator.

24. Every time anything serious happened in my life, he just... disappeared.

25. And then... reappeared.

26. Told me that what we had was, and I quote, "sacred", and then broke up with me in 2 days.

27. For some unknown reason, he tried to spin my adoption story into a more tragic one. Basically, I was adopted as an infant. For years, he was insistent that I must've been adopted as a teenager. I told him I was not. He asked me if I remembered the orphanage. I said I never went to an orphanage. And then he asked what would have happened to me (and if I would've grown up in an orphanage) if I hadn't been adopted as an infant.

28. Somehow tried to make my autoimmune disease about him. I mean, sure, yeah, it was most definitely triggered by stress, but like... how is MY disease about HIM. Before that, he did the same thing about my mental health issues as well, like, everything I ever went through is somehow about him.

29. When he broke up with me (through a text message, of course), he said that it was better for me this way, because my feelings were "one sided".

30. Then he accused me of lying about my feelings for him, which I never really did. I mean, I don't usually say "I love you" a lot to anyone, but I'm a very open person, and I like to talk about my feelings.

31. Told me I was toxic, for like, having intense emotions.

32. I never really knew what to expect from him. And I still don't. Like, I never know when he's going to get angry at me, or when he's going to get happy about something. Completely unpredictable.

33. He used to check my clothing labels. I have absolutely no idea why. Usually tried to do it without me noticing, but like, he always checked my clothing labels. Would he not have fucked me if I was wearing something cheap? I don't know.

34. As per my last post in this subreddit, the other day he called me multiple times at 6 in the morning, and then said that it was his phone calling me on its own. It's not the first time either, years ago he used to text me at 5-6 AM something like "Mariam" or "Are you there" and then stop responding for days.

That's it for today, y'all.

Honestly, rereading all of this, I feel like that maybe I should have posted this in r/NPD or something like that.

P.S: Forgot to mention, the time when he had me over at a party in his apartment, and by the end of the night I found out that some girl who was also at the party was his girlfriend.

P.P.S: Also forgot to mention, the time when he supported a business owned by a rapist, I called him out for that, he said that he's done nothing wrong to deserve being talked to with that tone.

Alright, so, I'll try to make this as short as possible, but I'm open to additional questions.

Basically, my Avoidant (30M) called me (27F) last night on Instagram.

I sleep with my phone on DND, so I woke up to 9 missed calls at 6AM, and a follow up message that roughly translates to "I hope I didn't wake you, sorry, I just got a new phone today and it's messing up. Hope you're sleeping well".

Right, that's literally the excuse he went with.

Anyway, I tried to keep the mood light and said something like "I don't think it's messing up, it knows exactly who it should call".

To which he replied by doubling down on the previous "just an accident" excuse, but changed the "my phone called you on its own at 6AM" narrative to "I misclicked 9 times in a row".

Frankly, I thought it was funny.

So, I tried to make a joke about it - called him, hang up immediately, and said something like "Sorry my dog was calling you idk why".

And guess what?

He didn't find it funny at all, got angry instead - told me to stop calling and texting him.

Then I said " You're saying "stop calling and texting" as if I got drunk and horny and called you 9 times at 6 in the morning" followed by "Oh, right, sorry, it was your phone calling me on its own" and blocked him.

I blocked him because at this point I'm just so very tired of his bullshit, and it's better for my peace.

But I still don't understand what the actual fuck has just happened and would very much like to have someone explain it to me - he wasn't supposed to call. Like, the last time we talked before this he said that the breakup was better for me, and that he preferred it this way too. He literally made it sound like he did me a favor by breaking my heart. This was like a little more than a month ago. And then he calls me, but says his phone called me on its own, and then tells me to stop calling him when he was the one who called me? What the actual fuck is going on, I'm so confused.

გამარჯობა, დნმ ტესტი მაქვს გამოწერილი და წესით, ამ დღეებში ჩამოვა. როგორც გავიგე, ტესტის უკან გაგზავნა არის პრობლემური და არც საქართველოს ფოსტას და არც გადამზიდებს არ მიაქვთ. მაინტერესებს, ვისაც გაქვთ გაკეთებული, როგორ გააგზავნეთ ლაბორატორიაში? უღრმეს მადლობას გიხდით წინასწარ.