u/kuu_panda_420

I live in Idaho, and they recently passed a law that criminalizes trans people using bathrooms that align with their gender identity. It goes into effect on July 1st and applies to both government buildings and any private businesses open to the public (so basically, anywhere that I might need to piss other than my house).

I usually pass very well as male, and fortunately there is a gender neutral restroom where I work. That being said, it's a single stall and I can definitely see myself needing to choose between the men's and women's in the future. Many of the people I work with know that I'm trans so if any of them have an issue with me, I can see it becoming a problem. I would pretty much 100% be using the men's if I had to choose, despite the fact that it will be illegal (unless the ACLU wins the lawsuit they've got surrounding this bill).

The main concern with the bill is that it would be difficult to enforce the law and difficult to discern someone's gender without "inappropriate or invasive questions and searching". For that reason, I want to know what exactly my rights are in the event that someone sees me in the men's room, decides to call the cops, and has an officer show up. I don't think it's a likely scenario but I obviously don't want to risk going to jail. I don't know much about my rights in that sort of situation. Would I be required to answer certain questions, and if I lied in any way about my gender, would they need to verify that/would I get in more trouble? To what extent can a cop search me in that situation before it's illegal and grounds for *me* to seek legal action? More importantly, how should I act to convince any suspecting cop that I'm definitely in the right place? I'd prefer to avoid a confrontation entirely if I can, but I want to be prepared.

I'm getting into songwriting as a beginner and I'm really struggling with the lyrics part. I play piano and I'm usually able to come up with a chord progression and melody that I like, but lyrics stump me. I feel like I'm usually a very descriptive writer, but when it comes to writing song lyrics, they never feel authentic or descriptive. Sometimes it feels like I'm trying so hard to come up with words that fit the melody and make sense that they end up sounding super generic. An example is this chorus of a song I'm writing:

"My time is your time, but I can use a little bit to take you home.

Because I give it up, give it up, give you my life, and with a bit of grit I can make anything happen.

Running out of time - Somebody shut me up, shut me up, before I run away.

My time is your time, but if I had enough, had enough, I could spend it all on my dreams."

Currently the only thing I have is the chords, melody and lyrics for the chorus, and the song is about being a people pleaser and trying to do everything for others, which leaves no energy to care for myself. I usually try writing a rant and then pick out phrases and words that I want to incorporate, but sometimes it doesn't make sense and doesn't fit the melody. The only other option is something like what I have written now, which I feel sounds generic and a bit cheesy.

What are some ways that I can improve my lyrics and make them sound more original and creative? Should I build the melody around the words instead of the other way around? What are some useful exercises or tricks that might help me organize my thoughts more efficiently and make them sound a little more unique?

I've seen some people say that singing can lead to a "somatic release" where it reflexively causes you to cry. While I think that's part of the issue, I also cry when I'm just listening to music. It doesn't necessarily have to be something particularly emotional - Even dance music makes me cry. I was literally dancing in my car last night listening to Hot To Go and it had me welling up. Music is pretty much the only thing that makes me cry, and it happens every single time without fail.

Is there a way to train myself to just sing through the tears? I was practicing just now and kept choking up, but sometimes I was able to get through a note just fine and the tears just fell. I don't know if I'm reflexively tensing my voice to stop the lump from forming or what, but I'd like to be able to sing while I'm tearing up. I don't think the emotional response is something that's going to pass because I've always had this experience with music and it's not really related to the lyrics or anything.

I know people use background noise to sleep and calm anxieties. Most of the time that's the answer being given, but I'm more concerned about the biology of it.

I cannot sleep with a light on unless I'm extremely tired, and it's unintentional. I can't consciously choose to sleep with a light on, a TV, or even with too much ambient light from the window at night. I need it to be pitch black to even fall asleep most nights. However, many of my friends are able to conk out instantly as soon as they turn on their favorite cartoon on TV. I get that sleep anxiety can play a role in that (I personally used to use a very quiet podcast or classical music to fall asleep because of intrusive thoughts), but I'm wondering if there's a biological component. Why is it that I can't stand to sleep with lights on or any noise above a slight whisper, but my friends can sleep uninterrupted all night with a bright TV in their faces, with the volume just below conversation-level? Is it just a matter of what they're used to vs. what I'm used to, or is there some mental or physical component that allows some people to produce more melatonin despite bright lights, or be more capable of drowning out distractions at night?