u/improngsss

I have mock exams almost every sunday and most of my peers do who are prearing for med school entrance but even if i take breaks or try to enjoy myself in the process, i just can't. I feel so much more stressed and anxious than most people that i can't enjoy anything.

I have this constant fear that i won't end up anywhere and it's a constant battle against my mind everyday. I have tried processing my thoughts and living in the present, but nothing works.

I just want to be able to study and not feel like this.

What's even more depressing is that i used to be so excited for my birthday months before and im turning 17 in 2 weeks and it's dreadful.

i'm really confused

I have a very important exam in a year and it was all going well and i was studying but out of nowhere i started crying non stop for 4-5 hrs and my heart is racing, my chest hurts, i can't even write my eyes are so blurry and my hands are shaking. Im going to die, please help.

(in 12th)

i was planning on just continuing with allen but due to fomo i feel like i should take fts too? I live in a small town so i'll have to travel an hour for offline test centre but i do take online test very seriously too.

So should i take AIATS or is Aakash FTS at the end good enough too?

Considering i will practice these papers at home in print format from telegram.

My mother laughs at me when i genuinely talk to her about my problems

As mentioned, everytime i (16f) talk to her about something that is troubling me she either makes it all about herself or laughs to my face. I recently opened up to her about how a teacher humiliated me in class and she said that i deserved that. Also my mom has been telling me that my nose ruins my appearance since i was 8 and recently she has started going on about how my chest is too big and i should exercise, i have gotten so insecure and im trying to lose weight but she forcefully makes me eat so much my stomach hurts and i feel nauseous. I tried to tell her about this and she made fun of me saying "nobody even looks at you" and that is a recurring statement by her everytime i put a little efforts into myself.

Few days ago we had to go to a wedding and i was trying out a dress i bought 3 years back and my mom said i look really fat in it, so i obviously didn't wear it and then got screamed at for buying dresses and never wearing them again like what the fuck.

It's getting so annoying im so sick of it.

I know she is a narcissist and i try to ignore it but it sub-consciously does effects my self esteem. And i need to get it out somewhere.

(im sorry about my grammar english is not my first language)

I'm not gonna change anything because well im 10 steps ahead, 27 will be the hardest mark my words.

keeping that in mind

 1.for physics im doing module races or jo bhi allen ka hota hai + jee pyqs 5 years + neet obv

 2.for chem same

 3.and for bio pyqs and figertips (mujhse module solve nhi hoti iski maybe only ex 3)

from now in may i'll do 12th and side by side try to complete pyqs of 11th kyuki module to mera ho hi gya hai of 11th

is this strategy good for a mind bending paper

+ koi or tips dedo if you want

Jo aap sabko aata hai vahi aayega ✨
and you’ll be smiling throughout the paper because you’ll realize you actually know everything

All the hard work will definitely pay off 🤍

At the end, it’s all about mindset
Results are not under your control, but your actions are
and you all have worked so hard, BE PROUD OF YOURSELF 🫶🔥

ALL THE BEST WARRIORS ⚔️
MAY THE SUN SHINE ON ALL OF YOU GUYS TOMORROW

By this sunday NEET 26 will be done, and next turn is ours. My heart is beating faster just thinking about it. As an online student i don't really have anyone to chat with about prep. My parent's only topic of discussion is NEET.

I feel so incompetent and under-prepared.

Also my stupid ass cannot sit down to study anymore, it's so frustrating.

My anxiety is not letting me study, i am lowkey really scared.