u/chocolateballdog

Hi everyone, I’m a 20 year old girl from the netherlands who has been dating a British man with Irish grandparents for nearly 3 years now.

I have come to a point where I’d be willing to settle down and move to the UK, but how does that even go and where do I even start?

Can anyone give me some sort of idea as to how it’ll go and the full prices on average as I have looked on google but I’m not sure what would apply and what wouldn’t and how it’d go to work.

What documents do I need and how does it all work?

Any advice and help would be appreciated!

Hi, I have been struggling with this thing recently. I a 20 year old dutch girl (working as a domestic support worker & lifeguard/administrative worker if that has any use) have been in a relationship with a British man for nearly 3 years now.

It’s come to a point where I would really want to move to the UK as him moving to me is unlikely at the moment due to his family situation, which I don’t mind moving to the UK - however the thing that is bothering me is how much it will cost me to move to him through the spousal route.

Is there any other way for me to move to the UK without requiring any sort of degree or a ton of money?

Otherwise I will just suck it up and go for it but especially recently with talk about the UK coming back to EU, I have been wondering whether it’s really worth over 5k just for me to move there… when we could just wait for that to happen.

What is the best option for me here, because I’m honestly at a loss.

Any help and suggestions will be so appreciated thank you.

Hi everyone,

I have recently been struggling with this dilemma and I don’t know if I’m the problem in this situation or how to fix it…

So to start off I have this friend who we’ll call Ava for this story. Ava has always been very outgoing and likes to mess around with men as in flirting and such but never really goes forward and just does it for the fun of it.

For example she was flirting with a guy and made plans to meet up for a day out together but when it came down to it she didn’t go, because she didn’t want anything serious just wanted the fun of it.

Recently Ava got introduced to a few of my friends and as she is she started to speak to them in a flirty manner but “jokingly”.

The guy (we will call him John) she had been speaking this was to thought it somewhat serious and thought that Ava might actually be interested in him.

A few days later Ava came to me concerned that people actually thought they were talking, I thought oh surely not and then low and behold John messages me about the situation and mentions that he did/does actually think they were talking and said they had been speaking and calling often without it being in a group chat.

Now here is where I may be the bad guy but I tried to comfort him and tell him maybe he miss read the situation but then he says that they’d been speaking often and implying that Ava was basically leading him on.

With the way she often is with guys I assumed this was the same situation however I worded it not so well as I was a bit confused by the situation and said to John that she does that all the time assuming he meant her flirting with guys in a joking manner.

John asked me to not tell Ava about it and I said okay thinking he was just being vulnerable and truthful about the situation.

The next day I wake up with a lot of messages from Ava saying that what I said is very wrong and basically just calling me out for it.

I tell her that I didn’t mean to come over the way and that it’s a misunderstanding and I never meant to hurt her feelings. I also messaged John this saying I was very disappointed and upset with the way he lied to me about her which caused me to react in a way I usually wouldn’t have.

She proceeds to say that it’s fine but then when it comes down to it, she never messages me anymore or calls.

I thought I will just let it sit and give her some time but after nearly 3 weeks of me not messaging she still hadn’t said a word to me so I messaged again trying to resolve our problems and the issue I caused.

She goes on to say that I victimise myself in every situation, because I try to explain what I meant which honestly I don’t understand. Does she just expect me to say nothing at all? I don’t see why I would message John saying that Ava isn’t a bad person at all and that she didn’t mean to “lead him on” in a sense and that it was his fault for interpreting it that way.

So we have a conversation and she says that I just try to make myself not look bad when I have owned up to what I said and acknowledged it was wrong even though it wasn’t what I meant to say.

Now I feel like our friendship is just very fragile and I don’t think she will reach out to me again, but I can’t decide wether I should just end it myself or just let it sit and hope she’ll reach out?

Help a friend out please, any advice would be appreciated. Excuse any faults in my grammar as English isn’t my first language.