u/bigbear474

My bf has been struggling with anxiety and depression pretty badly for about a year and a half now. And 90% of the time I know I’m there for him and helping however I can and doing the right things. But the other 10% of the time I slip up. I let my emotions get in the way and I get upset at him for things that I need to have patience for and things I usually have patience for.

Examples:
I got mad at him for having a big pile of dishes in his room, he’s usually good about it but when he is super anxious and depressed he has a difficult time with it. Same with laundry. Again, probably 99% of the time I don’t get upset about this bc I know it’s hard and I just do it for him or leave it for when he feels he can do it bc some days he feels good enough to do them.

He forgot to invite me to a big family lunch today. He forgot to invite me because he just wasn’t thinking about it because all he’s been trying to focus on in the past 3 days is controlling his breathing. He told me late last night but I committed to something that was too late to get out of but had he told me literally yesterday early afternoon, it would’ve been a non-issue and I would’ve been at lunch. He’s done this a couple times but this is the first time I missed it and I’m sad I didn’t get to see some of his family that I hadn’t seen in a while.

He made us late to a family dinner for my family because he fell asleep and had to shower and then came in an old t shirt. Again, he was just in a bad headspace and he felt super super bad about it. I was upset at him at first but calmed down really really fast bc I know it’s bc of how he’s doing mentally.

There’s more but these are recent examples. I know I shouldn’t be upset, he is truly down in the dumps. And I promise I have so much patience for him 90% of the time but that 10% I accidentally get upset and then it makes him feel worse and it’s like I’m pushing him further into a hole for a moment.

Any tips on how to deal with this? How to be more patient? I don’t feel like I’ve had a bf since he got into mental place. And I’m not upset at all that he’s doing bad mentally, it’s just a human reaction I guess? I miss him and miss dates and having fun together etc. but I have NEVER told him that bc none of this is in his control and he’s truly trying everything to get better. Info - we’ve been together 5 years and we’re 27.

Ps. Not a post on how to get him better mentally, it’s a post for how I can handle it better. So encouragement about meds, therapy etc aren’t needed because that’s all being taken care of

We’ve been together for 4 years. My (27f) bfs (27f) family is doing a Mother’s Day brunch and I overheard his mom say on the phone that she hopes both him and I can make it. His brother planned it and made resos. Well turns out his brother assumed I couldn’t come and didn’t ask me or my bf. We had no idea until my bf asked who was invited and his brother didn’t say his name.
Well I am available because my mom works during the day and we are doing a Mother’s Day dinner instead like we have my whole entire life.

Now my bf asked his brother to add another spot for the reso and he did. But now I don’t want to go bc I wasn’t originally invited.

I don’t want to because I don’t feel included and it sours my mood. I’ve gone to Mother’s Day and Father’s Day things a couple times in years we end up having different celebration times. Is it rude to not be invited? Like am I being rude by not coming? Is it petty? I’ve been included in other things but maybe because it’s not my mom I shouldn’t go?

I am graduating with a Masters in epidemiology. From what I understand, I can be an epidemiologist, data analyst or policy analyst. Is there more?

Also how do I find corporate jobs in my city to apply for and how do I apply? There’s nothing available for the government which would’ve been my dream (Canada).

Any tips???? And also I know I should cold email places, how to cold email??? Who to cold email???

I am trying to apply for jobs with the Mb government, it's my first time as i just completed my schooling. Each job posting says to email your resume and cover letter, but they also have an "apply now" button that basically makes the email for you and you copy and past your resume and cover letter.

Which is the better way to apply? and if it's emailing - what do i say in the email?