u/Vigilante_kt

Hughhh a failure, born with a weak body, my legs were crooked and weak, weak heart and lungs with forearms defect and liver failure , yet i pushed through it, my father wanted me to be a cricketer but i couldn't, so he lost all hope in me abondened me in my childhood, never earned for our family, an alcoholic and abusive guy, used to beat me uptoo alot. My mother never focused on me as she was too busy with my father and his problems so I never got what love feels like from any of my parents, bullied since childhood, but I was always kind to others, I helped a street dog and gave him a shelter for 2 years until my family toldne to leave him and then he died, my dog helped me through a lot too, i failed eventually in class 7th with 21% but due to Covid we all passed and ever since then I've been trying my best everyday, everynight, I've had a dream of living this life I wanna live I wanna be loved and keep loving others but I can't, my family doesn't give me any money so I earn my own money from my handicrafts and art skills on my small insta business. I got 89% in 10th and I was damn happy but then my gf in 10th standard left me cause I was boring and she got with her bhai jaisa best friend. I live everyday on a brink of death, I can't eat oil and sugar that much or else I'll die cause my liver can't digest it and it's fucked up. And here we are, my father keeps fighting me and I fights back, my mother only views me as a tool to earn money and flaunt on my achievements. No sense of love and belongingness from my family, I teach poor kids, i feed dogs cause I love doing it but I wish God can give me even 5% OF MY efforts back I'll be damn happy man, I've still got friends though a few but they're real ones and I love them, but as today 12th results came and I'm disappointed, I got 87% overall and 74 in bst, 86 in accounts and 87 in eco while i studied for like 10 hours daily for the last 7 months and I'm so dead I don't wanna continue anymore my efforts are futile and shallow, I've got my economics CUET on 15yh may, that is tomorrow and I'm ready for it but I'm not ready mentally I'm so fucking done and i don't wanna even eat, I wanna take my life and end it all cause I'm so fucking tired ma'lord. Oh btw my favourite heroes are Superman, Deku, Gohan, Star Lord, Iron man) 😋 i just want this world to be a betterplace and make an impact here if I can even change a person's life I'll be damn happy but i also wanna feel a bit loved man , I want someone to hug me( I've never been deeply hugged too)

Hughhh a failure, born with a weak body, my legs were crooked and weak, weak heart and lungs with forearms defect and liver failure , yet i pushed through it, my father wanted me to be a cricketer but i couldn't, so he lost all hope in me abondened me in my childhood, never earned for our family, an alcoholic and abusive guy, used to beat me uptoo alot. My mother never focused on me as she was too busy with my father and his problems so I never got what love feels like from any of my parents, bullied since childhood, but I was always kind to others, I helped a street dog and gave him a shelter for 2 years until my family toldne to leave him and then he died, my dog helped me through a lot too, i failed eventually in class 7th with 21% but due to Covid we all passed and ever since then I've been trying my best everyday, everynight, I've had a dream of living this life I wanna live I wanna be loved and keep loving others but I can't, my family doesn't give me any money so I earn my own money from my handicrafts and art skills on my small insta business. I got 89% in 10th and I was damn happy but then my gf in 10th standard left me cause I was boring and she got with her bhai jaisa best friend. I live everyday on a brink of death, I can't eat oil and sugar that much or else I'll die cause my liver can't digest it and it's fucked up. And here we are, my father keeps fighting me and I fights back, my mother only views me as a tool to earn money and flaunt on my achievements. No sense of love and belongingness from my family, I teach poor kids, i feed dogs cause I love doing it but I wish God can give me even 5% OF MY efforts back I'll be damn happy man, I've still got friends though a few but they're real ones and I love them, but as today 12th results came and I'm disappointed, I got 87% overall and 74 in bst, 86 in accounts and 87 in eco while i studied for like 10 hours daily for the last 7 months and I'm so dead I don't wanna continue anymore my efforts are futile and shallow, I've got my economics CUET on 15yh may, that is tomorrow and I'm ready for it but I'm not ready mentally I'm so fucking done and i don't wanna even eat, I wanna take my life and end it all cause I'm so fucking tired ma'lord. Oh btw my favourite heroes are Superman, Deku, Gohan, Star Lord, Iron man) 😋 i just want this world to be a betterplace and make an impact here if I can even change a person's life I'll be damn happy but i also wanna feel a bit loved man , I want someone to hug me( I've never been deeply hugged too)