u/ThanksSolid1445

Is there anyone here who has had success / failures with dirted tanks?

Are there pros and cons to red soil as substrate vs aquasoil?

- I have 1 planted community tank with aquasoil.
- Considering 2nd planted tank for betta + sterbai corydoras with dirt.

Yay / Nay? 😁

…third year in a row.

I’m guessing for most of us, our birthdays are a big deal. And we celebrate our boyfriend / husbands birthdays like it’s the New Year’s Day parade. Full taam jhaam, surprises, expensive gifts etc.

And I’ve done all of it… every year for 5 years we’ve been together.

My husband told me this year he’s not going to mess it up. He’s slacked off last 2 years, so this year is going to be different.

Yes… it was different. He told me we had to leave at 8.30 pm for a dinner reservation that he was excited to take me to. He woke up from his afternoon nap at 9.30 pm. I ordered food online, ate quietly and went to sleep.

I took myself out the next day, got some gooood whiskey cocktails, had a badass steak, went for a movie, went shopping and kept singing in my head “I can buy myself flowers” lol. But the whole time I couldn’t shake the feeling that “It’s not my birthday today”.

But 2 days later, here I am gaslighting myself that: He’s a good guy (that part is true. He’s sensitive and caring. His masculinity is not threatened by my dominant personality which has been a relief after dating Indian men with fragile egos). But I’m consoling myself that yes he’s a good guy so I should overlook this. Well guess what? I’m a good wife too. I don’t slack off on his birthdays. I make him feel like this day was blessed only because he was born!! Last year I flew out his parents half way across the country as they’re getting old and have limited birthdays left with their son.

There’s not going to be a 4th chance. Next year, My birthday on my terms. But the question is… how do I move past this situation? I don’t want to be the first one to address this to make peace.