u/Sorry_Salamander8302

Im saying this with love, you guys need to ask for more money. You can do it. even if you get told no, you dont get what you dont ask for. I know people are usually asking for advice here, but im going to give some.

usually you're being offered the lowest end of the budget (especially for women. it's the unfortunate truth, but we do typically get low ball offers more often than men), and they dont anticipate that you'll ask for more. however, 9 times out of then, if you DO ask, you'll get more. if you dont youre genuinely leaving money on the table.

anyways, heres a base template of asking for a higher salary when that job offer comes in.

"Hello (hiring manager),

Thank you so much for the offer, I'm grateful for the opportunity.

Before I sign, I did want to ask if there is any flexibility regarding the budget for this role. After reviewing the offer and considering the current cost of living in (city), the average salary for similar roles, and (add something about your specific skillset that adds value), I would feel most comfortable with a rate of (salary range). I'm confident that my skills will add value to the team, and I look forward to finding a number that works well for both parties.

Thank you again for the opportunity, looking forward to working together."

Aaaand there you go. get your money.

ive been working my shitty barista survival job since my last company dissolved. finally got a job offer. triple my salary. cool company. the plan is to relocate to NYC. two fridays ago i get the offer email and "we'll get the paperwork to you by monday", monday i get an email saying "things are busy right now, we'll get paperwork to you Wednesday" cool, fine i've waited this long. wednesday i get an email "hey, we'll actually get it to you by friday" and friday i hear nothing.

I sent an email on monday "hey, just following up on that paperwork, excited to start!" and.... nothing. sent another follow up this morning... still nothing.

i dont know what to do. this feels cruel. if things changed, just let me know. now i have 0 clue if im being ghosted, or if this is due to the fact that the company is putting on a massive event this week and onboarding just fell to the bottom of the priority list, the budget for the role got lost, nothing.

like im still holding onto a sliver of hope but im at the end of my rope. im so sick of applying. i finally thought i made it through, and now im worried its all going to crumble and im going to have to go to square one again. thank goodness im not dumb enough to quit my survival income without signing anything but it still sucks

yeah that was horrible 💔

so many mediocre dudes going through the drive through and getting a handful of 10 dollar gift cards (which like... whats that gonna buy your wife/mother/other woman in your life who youre probably disappointing buddy) and/or complaining about having to do the bare minimum of picking up 3-4 drinks and making nasty comments about "all this sweet shit".

and so. many. men. yellinggggg at me because we're out of stuff. we ran out of basically everything. brown sugar syrup, all cake pops, brownies, butter croissants, cheese danishes, bacon goudas, sausage cheddars, turkey bacons, and bacon sausage wraps. "okay well my wife sent me to get xyz, what am i supposed to do?" GO TO ANOTHER STARBUCKS? or if you wanted to guarantee items, make a reservation at an actual restaurant, not do a half assed starbies run? and dont even get me STARTED on the "wheres my drink ive been waiting for 5 minutes" WE LITERALLY RAN OUT OF SPAACEEEEEE ON THE HAND OFF PLANE. because every single mobile was like a minimum of 5 drinks. at one point I hit 40 hot bar.

i need a cigarette. or 20.

So like the title says, my friend has unfortunately ended up the affair partner in a grand old cheating scandal. shes been dating this dude for nine-ish months now, and 3 months ago found out he has a girlfriend of SEVEN years. we live in city A, he lives in city B, but works in city A so is consistently driving the 3 hours from B to A and staying in city A for about a week every month. his girlfriend lives with him in city B, along with their two dogs. "work travel" is how he was keeping things all hush hush.

but secrets dont like to stay hidden. 3 months ago my friend managed to find the gf's instagram with all of their couple pictures. she was devastated, but didnt confront him about it until a month later. she did not send a "hey girly" message. He pulled the typical "im not happy with her but its complicated because we live together, but i swear i only want you! i'll leave her i pwomise pwincess" and my friend bought it hook line and sinker. she told him "you have a month to leave her"

and he did....nt. yeah. shockingly, the liar lied. he said he broke up with the gf a month ago, but the gf posted recent photos of them together, and they did a whole "may the 4th be with you" costume photodump on instagram. very much so still together.

Now my friend is upset all over again, the gf is STILL being cheated on, and this guy is having his cake and eating it to. i can tell my friend has 0 intention to leave, he has her wrapped around his finger. My friend deserves better (she can scream "but daddy i love him!" all she wants, but she has no business being a side chick), the gf deserves better, and the guy deserves to lose them both.

the guy also knows who i am and has my social media, and has taken to DMing ME if my friend doesnt respond to him qucik enough and asking me to tell her to call him.

I have the gfs instagram account. her dms are open, and i dont know if i should dm her or not. i have screenshots and proof. i just dont know if its my place to get involved to this level.

EDIT: wasn't thinking super hard while writing this, but im 26F on an 85k/yr salary. im not really into nightlife or picky about in unit washer/dryers. Im also from dc and used to a loud city, so i dont need a super quiet neighborhood. not fully opposed to a roommate in the future, i just work better living solo if im not living with a romantic partner.

Hey! I recently got a job in the city and will be relocating to NYC shortly. I'm trying to decide between Astoria and Yorkville. the office i'll be in is pretty close to times square, and i dont want an insane commute. I'm from a city with a subway system already, and i know that a 45 minute commute is the longest im able to tolerate on the train.

im not looking to live anywhere fancy, a studio is enough for me and im okay living and paying alone. are these two solid neighboorhoods to look at, should i consider other locations?