u/SeaPatient6594

I'm 25F .. my friend is 25M.. we have known each other since 2020.... he is 6 months younger to me.. we know each other since college.. we studied together from the second year of engineering... he is my best friend.. everyone in college thought we were together.. he said he liked me right in the beginning.. but i said i don't.. he said it's okay and our friendship continued... I liked him too.. but i don't know whether it was lust or something else.. in 4th year we got a little involved physically...it was due to the heat of the moment.. didn't do anything much .. since the past 3 yrs we got lot more physically involved...didn't have sex but we kissed.. went up till 3rd base... maybe just 3 times in 3 years.. we sexted each other a lot...

Every night I think of us.. spending time together... making love..

All this while he kept telling he loves me..i know he loves me..he is veryy genuine.. always cares.. always puts efforts..how much ever i push him away. He always kept coming back.. he is the greenest flag

It's been more than 5yrs since he has told he loves me.. I've been pushing it.. maybe my heart loves him too..

I want more of him..when we meet ..and he leaves..i miss him so much... I'm usually not a person who stays connected to ppl but when it is him i want to talk to him every day..

I always wanted to marry the person i dated.. I'm kind of perfectionist and wanteverything to be perfect.. I come from middle class family..in childhood i had to compromise on lot of things cos of money... to study well amd save...

When it comes to his family..i really don't like them.. they don't really have anything much.. my parents after struggling andsaving so much have done some things for me and my sister...

Both of us are in good job now.. he earns more than me and really well..

He's that kind of person who's so easy going.. Goes to gym.. office.. eats sleeps amd loves traveling.. in this 5yrs never thought of anyone else expect me

When I think about the marriage part with him..i feel like running away and not wanting this..he has a useless sister too who spends his money like crazy..does nothing

All this irritates me.. my parents said let's start searching for marriage next year.. I'm really confused..abt him...i don't know whetehr i love him..is it just physical lust or actual love

When he doesn't talk to me i feel very bad.. he says he'll wait for me until the day i get married..

Sometimes i feel i should meet some boys in arranged marriage and see what i really want...

Some one help me please......

I'm a 25F Indian.. I work in a good bank as an engineer and earn well.. i did engineering from the top college from my state.. studied very well to get there.. was also a state rank holder in 12th and 10th std.. was always competitive.. wanted to study and be really independent..

Didn't bother making friends or knowing what I really like or don't.. got internship in 3rd yr also placed in yr 3rd yr itself.. everything was prefect academically.. my parents are also great.. have been always supportive and encouraged to study whatever i liked..I have an elder sistet..she was always with me..and she was my best frnd.. never felt like making any frnds cos no one was like her.. but she got married in 2024 and then I have been feeling soo lonely..

But all the way in my childhood...I was always perfect. Never missed any home work.. never ever got any punishment.. never was scolded by any teacher.

I'm happy with what I've done.. but now i hardly have friends.. weekdays I am very occupied with work.. office.. traffic.. and my schedule..i don't feel much lonely..

But weekends..i have no where to go.. no friends..

When i see ppl putting their gang on instagram I feel so sad.. maybe if i had done some frnds in school or atleast in engineering..I could have looked forward to have a good weekend or a trip.

I've never been on any trip in this 3yrs of working..apart from going to the native with my parents for festival or function.

I go to khatak dance class.. it's on saturday for 1.5hrs..

Past close to 2 years I've been facing a lot of health issues..with gut which triggered anxiety this that..currently taking ayurveda medicine for that

Parents are telling marriage next yr let's search .. I'm really unsure of marriage. But at the same time i feel sometimes let's get married ..atleast I'll have a companion

Never been a rebel kid..never gone against parents..sometimes i feel so angry on myself..wonder why I forgot myself... but i didn't have an option to roam around with my friends and not study..i had to make it work...

Now i want friends..i want to go around.. but mainly health is not very supportive..i need to take care a lot of my diet..and also i can't go alone since i can't survive in crowded places..

I'm scared this Ai this that will take away my job.. so i try to save so much almost 90 percent of my salary

Everyone tells 20s are your thing.. but the first half atleast wasn't for me..

Suffered a lot with health.. still a little.. crowded noisy places or unfamiliar one's .. can't survive

I don't look forward a lot to my future... it's just like one day at a time.. most of the times i feel I'm pushing through the days..

Sometimes i feel maybe i still should dream a little.. but somewhere I'm so lost in the practicality of the world that I've stopped being fantasied by things..

Wish I had better health.. then would I have been able to get a little out of my comfort zone? Or made some friends?

I'm soo much into perfectionism that now if i make a small mistake or fight with my parents for a small thing or even raise my voice a little i feel so guilty...and can't forgive myself

I've been very hard on myself ik.. I just want my job always so that I'm always busy and feel I'm worth.. else on weekends like this I feel crazy just scrolling reels and sleeping :(

I am Indian 25F , I have an in hand of 1.4L per month.

I am overly obsessed with buying gold and silver bees..I have around 5k goldbees and 1k silverbees. Apart from that I have some FD, also invest in nifty 50, next 50, midcap 150 and smallcap 250 Mutual funds ( all of jio blackrock since the expense ratio is less). Last year I invested lot in goldbees and silverbees but this year I have decided to put more in Mfs.. Also just started putting in Arbitrage fund to avoid tax

Apart from this is there any other better option for me? I don't want too much risky options..But also good ones..Please suggest