u/Numerous-Total-8373

My husband has a daughter who is 9 and she sometimes likes me and sometimes doesn’t. Like she doesn’t want me around. BM has a husband that she acts the same way with. So my husband and her talked and she suggested us all going to lunch to show that we can all get along and co parent in front of the child. Would this be a good idea really? I’ve read some pros and cons to the whole situation and I’m not sure if I think it’s a good idea or a bad idea. Any advice or tips would be appreciated

Me and my husband have been together for 5 years..he has a daughter who is 9 from a previous marriage. So he has split custody with the mom. The mom moved and got married. Back to the child.. I have always been really nice and sweet to her, I have tried to spend time with her, I’ve bought her things and all that. So it sounds like there wouldn’t be a problem right? Today we went mini golfing..everything was fine and she was happy. And halfway through golfing she decides she doesn’t want me around so her attitude changed..I tried asking what was wrong she wouldn’t tell me..her dad tried asking what was wrong and she would tell him. She said she’s was afraid to hurt my feelings..I said honey it’s okay just tell me what’s wrong. So it came out she didn’t want me there. Well she likes to tell her dad sometimes she doesn’t want me around and she has lied on me a few times trying to tell her dad something in front of me when it’s not true. So I clearly say that’s a lie. And this last time when she tried it we were out to eat(and she was whispering something to him) and then she quit whispering and was talking and I asked if I could have the keys to his truck because I was not going to sit there and be made out to be somebody I’m not. My husband got mad and told me to grow up and act like an adult and I said I am..and that I wasn’t saying anything and I just didn’t want to be a part of that. He said she’s a child..why don’t you just move(like leave the relationship). This was while we were sitting in a restaurant. He said you can go outside I’m not giving you the keys..so I went outside. He said all this in front of her too. I have tried to talk and everything and I’ve tried to be nice to her and it all just gets thrown back in my face. I really don’t know what to do? Does anyone have any advice or suggestions please? What am I doing wrong?