u/New_Print9938

i’ve been put through the ringer, as I assume a lot of people are nowadays, with love bombing and people who just wanna get laid. As they say no one likes you more than someone that just hasn’t had sex with you yet lol.

i’m matched with the guy last week on Tinder. (Me 31 F, him 33 M) I don’t do small talk (I put on my Tinder profile i don’t wanna do small talk Let’s just meet at a dive bar and see if we hit it off) so he set a time in place at a dive bar in my town that he thought I would like, I changed it last minute because it was a nice day so I wanted to be outside (Sunday). We hit it off instantly, was like a seven hour first meet up. everything matched up with what we are looking for in our potential partners and lives. ( I will say 99% of my initial meet ups do not make it to an actual date / second meet up, and he is the first person in a long time I was excited to meet before the initial meet up and he was even better in person) He asked if we could hang out again the next day (Monday) I ended up staying out with my friends at the dive bar way too late Sunday night and I was so hung over Monday that I had to bail, he was very understanding he called me during the day bc he just wanted to hear from me, no fuss, decided to pivot to Tuesday. I live in a cute mountain town about 30 minutes from him, he knew I still wasn’t up to par Tuesday but he wanted to see me so he planned a picnic by the river. He brought everything from blankets to fresh fruit to desserts, genuinely so nice and thoughtful. I asked him about his previous dating, he got out of relationship in 2022 and has been single since, just got back on the apps less than a year ago, said he’s not much into going on dates thru the app and I’m like his second date in a year. Had our first kiss. when we are walking around town, he initiated holding my hand the whole time / whenever he got a chance. we walked along the river for about 30 minutes and he mentioned that if we were dating in June he would pay for my plane ticket to his cousin‘s wedding. He did seem a little jittery and nervous and he held my hand the whole time. ( He is a massive 6ft big built viking with long hair and beard and in construction, my type) He is a carpenter and lives in the city but is on a project in another mountain town so he had to head back out yesterday (Wednesday) and he asked if he could stop by and see me before he heads out until Sunday. I was leaving to go meet up with my friends and he wasn’t ready to hit the road, but he really wanted to say hi to me and kiss me before he leaves, so I told him where I was going he picked a spot on the map to meet that was on my way, he drove 20 minutes down to meet me hug me talk to me give me a kiss and then drove back 20 minutes to his house to get ready to head out for the week. We are also huge Vikings fans and he was talking about going to see a game in November with me and visit his home. he also called me last night when he got back to his camper van in the mtn town / when I got home from the bar with my friends. He started calling me sweetheart. we have plans to hang out Sunday and paddleboard, he’s gonna head down Sunday morning to spend the day with me and then head back up Sunday night. today he sent me a video of his campervan he lives in when he goes to sites, and said your turn let’s see your apartment (it was jokingly it wasn’t said creepy I will give him that), I jokingly said like along lines of if you’re patient maybe one day you’ll see my apartment, he replied that he can be patient for me. i’m just having a hard time of deciphering what this is. i’d rather be single than deal with another love bomber / guy that just wants to get laid and is gonna leave after post nut clarity. i’m also not the type of person to do the "talking" or "exclusive" phase. I’m either completely single or completely committed, if a guy doesn’t want me to give out my number to someone else, then they should make me his, but I’m not gonna tell other people no to a date if someone’s not committed to me. i’m treading so lightly with this one with not giving into the illusion of a false hope and entertaining a dream scenario because everyone in the state is a love bomber , but I’ve been single for so long It’s so blurry to me what real intention is. any helps or input is appreciated :)

TLDR: how to know if the initial interest is just wanting to have sex or love bomb versus actually getting to know someone / date them intentionally

i’ve been put through the ringer, as I assume a lot of people are nowadays, with love bombing and people who just wanna get laid. As they say no one likes you more than someone that just hasn’t had sex with you yet lol.

i’m matched with the guy last week on Tinder. (Me 31 F, him 33 M) I don’t do small talk (I put on my Tinder profile i don’t wanna do small talk Let’s just meet at a dive bar and see if we hit it off) so he set a time in place at a dive bar in my town that he thought I would like, I changed it last minute because it was a nice day so I wanted to be outside (Sunday). We hit it off instantly, was like a seven hour first meet up. everything matched up with what we are looking for in our potential partners and lives. ( I will say 99% of my initial meet ups do not make it to an actual date / second meet up, and he is the first person in a long time I was excited to meet before the initial meet up and he was even better in person) He asked if we could hang out again the next day (Monday) I ended up staying out with my friends at the dive bar way too late Sunday night and I was so hung over Monday that I had to bail, he was very understanding he called me during the day bc he just wanted to hear from me, no fuss, decided to pivot to Tuesday. I live in a cute mountain town about 30 minutes from him, he knew I still wasn’t up to par Tuesday but he wanted to see me so he planned a picnic by the river. He brought everything from blankets to fresh fruit to desserts, genuinely so nice and thoughtful. I asked him about his previous dating, he got out of relationship in 2022 and has been single since, just got back on the apps less than a year ago, said he’s not much into going on dates thru the app and I’m like his second date in a year. Had our first kiss. when we are walking around town, he initiated holding my hand the whole time / whenever he got a chance. we walked along the river for about 30 minutes and he mentioned that if we were dating in June he would pay for my plane ticket to his cousin‘s wedding. He did seem a little jittery and nervous and he held my hand the whole time. ( He is a massive 6ft big built viking with long hair and beard and in construction, my type) He is a carpenter and lives in the city but is on a project in another mountain town so he had to head back out yesterday (Wednesday) and he asked if he could stop by and see me before he heads out until Sunday. I was leaving to go meet up with my friends and he wasn’t ready to hit the road, but he really wanted to say hi to me and kiss me before he leaves, so I told him where I was going he picked a spot on the map to meet that was on my way, he drove 20 minutes down to meet me hug me talk to me give me a kiss and then drove back 20 minutes to his house to get ready to head out for the week. We are also huge Vikings fans and he was talking about going to see a game in November with me and visit his home. he also called me last night when he got back to his camper van in the mtn town / when I got home from the bar with my friends. He started calling me sweetheart. we have plans to hang out Sunday and paddleboard, he’s gonna head down Sunday morning to spend the day with me and then head back up Sunday night. today he sent me a video of his campervan he lives in when he goes to sites, and said your turn let’s see your apartment (it was jokingly it wasn’t said creepy I will give him that), I jokingly said like along lines of if you’re patient maybe one day you’ll see my apartment, he replied that he can be patient for me. i’m just having a hard time of deciphering what this is. i’d rather be single than deal with another love bomber / guy that just wants to get laid and is gonna leave after post nut clarity. i’m also not the type of person to do the "talking" or "exclusive" phase. I’m either completely single or completely committed, if a guy doesn’t want me to give out my number to someone else, then they should make me his, but I’m not gonna tell other people no to a date if someone’s not committed to me. i’m treading so lightly with this one with not giving into the illusion of a false hope and entertaining a dream scenario because everyone in the state is a love bomber , but I’ve been single for so long It’s so blurry to me what real intention is. any helps or input is appreciated :)