u/Mediocre-Winter-4190

my boyfriend (19M) and i(19F) constantly fight about my past. how do i make things better?

My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 months, and honestly our relationship is really good except for one thing: he gets extremely sad/upset about my past.

The thing is, I’ve never even done anything physical with anyone before him. I’ve never gone on dates with anyone except him either. Before we dated, I only had some talking stages and online “relationships.” I’ve always been completely honest with him about all of it.

The problem is that sometimes old talking stages/random guys/exes still message me saying they miss me or still “love” me. I never entertain it, I shut it down, and I’m fully loyal to my boyfriend. But every time it happens, he becomes distant and quiet even after I reassure him.

It feels unfair because I can’t control who messages me, only how I respond, and I’ve never disrespected our relationship. I feel like I’m constantly having to prove my loyalty over things I didn’t even do.

What worries me most is that he says he hates even knowing another guy has talked to me before, and I’m scared he’ll eventually lose feelings over this stuff. Is this normal insecurity or is this unhealthy? Are a lot of guys actually like this?

tldr: boyfriend is stuck on my past and im scared he might lose feelings for me.

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u/Mediocre-Winter-4190 — 16 hours ago

my boyfriend gets extremely upset about my past

My boyfriend and I have been dating for 8 months and our relationship is honestly really good except for one issue: my past.

I’ve never done anything physical with anyone before him, and before we dated I only had talking stages/online exes. I’ve always been honest with him about everything, but the problem is that old talking stages or random guys or my exes (all online, never even been on a date with anyone except for my bf) still sometimes reach out to me saying they miss me or that they still “love” me.

I never entertain it and I’m completely loyal to my boyfriend, but whenever it happens he goes distant and quiet even after I reassure him. It feels unfair because I can’t control who messages me, only how I respond, and I’ve never disrespected our relationship.

I really love him, but it’s exhausting constantly feeling like I have to prove my loyalty over things I didn’t even do. Is this normal insecurity or is there something I’m not understanding?

my main concern is him losing feelings for me over this stuff ( he says that he hates even when a guy knows me or has even talked to me).

reddit.com
u/Mediocre-Winter-4190 — 16 hours ago