u/Large-Cheesecake9974

Hello guys, I’m M20 and I’ve been in a relationship with my girlfriend (18) for around 3 months now. I genuinely love this girl with my whole heart. I sacrificed a lot for this relationship and honestly I always felt like I was the one trying the hardest to make it work, especially at the beginning when she seemed a bit careless.

Even though I loved and trusted her, I always had this feeling that she still talked to her ex. She mentioned him a lot, still followed him, and we had many arguments about it to the point where we almost broke up. Eventually she told me she blocked him and stopped talking to him, but something inside me still felt uneasy.

I know what I did next was wrong and many people will judge me for it, but one night while she was asleep I checked her phone just to clear my mind… and unfortunately my doubts were right.

She was still texting her ex, calling him “my love” and other romantic names, having intimate conversations and video calls with him. What broke me the most is that she even shared old sexual content between them while we were already together and official.

I felt completely destroyed. I kept asking myself why she would do that if she supposedly loved me. Was she pretending the whole time? I honestly felt so lost.

The only reason I didn’t break up with her immediately is because she currently has very important finals/exams, and I didn’t want to ruin her mental state during them. So I decided I would wait until she finishes. But it hurts so much pretending everything is okay.

The confusing part is that later on I saw that she actually told her ex she wanted to stop talking to him because she was happy in her relationship, and since then she really has been showing me more love than ever. She talks about marriage, our future together, and forever… and it kills me because I have to act normal knowing what I saw.

I really do love her and care about her deeply, but I feel betrayed. I feel like I was just an option or a backup plan. I already struggled with extreme jealousy before this, and discovering all of this completely broke me.

I honestly don’t know what to do or how to even bring this up to her. Part of me wants to leave because I don’t think I can ever forget this, but another part still loves her so much.

I just need advice from people who maybe went through something similar because I feel completely lost right now.

Hello guys im M[20] i have been in relationship with my girlfriend[18] for 3 months already, I love this girl with my whole heart i would do anything for her you can’t know how much i sacrificed for her im the one who was trying the hardest to make this relationship work while she was bit careless at the beginning. Even tho i really love her and trust her i was always having doubts that she still talk to her ex because she mentions him alot and she was still following him and we had many fights and arguments because of that we almost broke up ,even tho she stopped doing it and she said she blocked him ( she didn’t) something inside of me felt unrelieved.
So i did something that many people would find it disgusting or not cool but just to clear my mind i checked her phone when she was asleep …. And unfortunately my doubts were right she was still texting him, calling him my love and all names they share intimate things and stuff video calls , she even shared sexual content of them in the past with him while we were together and official. I was soo shocked and sad because why , why would she do that we love eachother soo much or was she just good at pretending!? Idk i felt soo lost the only thing that was keeping me from breaking up with her is that she had important finals to pass i didn’t want to break up with here while she is talking them so for that i decided that i will do it after she finishs them , and it hurts as hell i was always checking and at one time she told her ex that she wanna stop talking to him and she is happy relationship and she actually stopped and started showing her love even more and it hurts guys whenever she mentions marriage and being together forever and being forced to agree with her and be with her for the sake of her exams i just even tho i know she really loves me now but i cant i feel betrayal i feel like i was an option idk how to explain it but i really love her and care for her but i cannot be with her even after seizing those pictures she sent and i was already struggling with my radioactive jealousy it just broke me and now idk how to bring that up for her i find it hard to .
Can’t anyone guide me to what to do or just give me a advice maybe !? I feel soo lost