Hi everybody, so to set the scene:
For the past few years, my life has been bumpy-ish. Me, my mum, and my sister moved out of her boyfriends house, and lived in my grandma’s house for the good part of a year because he regularly verbally (and sometimes physically) abused her. We only moved out when he accidentally revealed himself on facebook by posting something he meant to share to her privately. The straw that broke the Camel’s back if you will.
Anyway, me and my Dad have never got along. He’s an acquired taste. His childhood was negligible and he holds resentment for the way my mother treated me as a child. Fast forward to modern day, obviously this still creates some tension between us, i don’t feel fully comfortable around him.
Anyway, he’s gotten engaged to a woman i’ve met once, and who he’s known 7 months. Obviously, considering the last partner i had to meet, i’ve not been thrilled, infact i’ve been pretty distant (keep in mind i’m 18, so whilst i still rely on him for a home, that’s pretty much it). But now we’re moving house. I’m not thrilled at all. He claims that my not wanting to move stems from a desire to control those around me. I’ve never been more badly misunderstood in my life, by my own dad nonetheless.
All this tension came crashing down when i eventually broke and called him a ‘cunt’. I know, bad. Anyway, it resulted in him threatening me, offering a fight, and grabbing me by my neck and trying to push me down the stairs. I went to live with my mum for two weeks, all the while he was still calling me selfish, and refusing to understand why i wouldn’t want to move. He claims i’m selfish and everying must be about me at all times. I can’t remember the last time he ever regarded me in anyhting.
Point is, and what i’m asking for advice around is, this was all 1-2 months ago. I’ve forgiven him, and moved back in.I know i’ll face the same sort of argument again at some point, and i’ll have to move regardless, but should i forgive him? He laid hands on me, he broke that barrier of trust, and yet i’m just going along with the flow again. I’m off to uni soon, and i won’t have to see him or move in really much at all, i just fear that this will add to the hostility even more. Literally i’m clueless, what do i do?