u/JusticeBeaverHQ

So, I had written my post here and it kinda shot up. Received a lot of DMs, and I ended up meeting three women with exactly the traits I had asked for over the last few weeks. I never thought Reddit would work, but it happened anyway!

One thing that irked them during our conversations was when I told them that I have 0 body count. They were quite taken aback, either by surprise or they were probably thinking that I was lying (I’m not sure). These were women with 2-4 body counts, apparently from whatever they shared, or maybe even higher. One asked me whether I am asexual (which I am not!), and the other two were quite open that they were looking for someone ‘with experience’ which sounded like a hard pass. However, I did tell them that I have been in three relationships in the past, and I consciously did not prefer rushing into doing the thing, and just stuck to making out with my girlfriends. They weren’t convinced about this anyway.

While I am not being very particular about marrying a virgin woman despite me being one and my age not being on my side, I would like to understand from the virgin women here on how they see a virgin guy in this market? Do they too want someone with experience or would they be happy 'figuring out together'? With women having higher body counts rejecting me based on inexperience (this has happened to me when I met women through dating apps as well), I would like to understand why someone saving themselves up for THE woman of their life is being frowned upon? As much as I am progressive in most things about relationships, this is one thing I have consciously remained old school, and I have never regretted it one bit.

There were days when people used to get rejected for not being a virgin, but things seem to be uno reversing in my case.

Would love to hear your thoughts.

Hey All,

Tried posting this on another sub, but thought of giving it a shot here.

I’m a South Indian based in BLR, coming from an educated upper-middle-class family background. I’m a postgraduate and work in B2B SaaS, earning north of 70L++. Giving it a shot here since the dating scene is totally messed up in this city.

My basic information: Hindu, non-vegetarian, 5’7”, athletic build, non-smoker, non-drinker

My personality: A calm, no-nonsense, modest, low-drama guy who is good at witty and sarcastic humor. I’m definitely fair looking for South Indian standards. I’m artsy, emotionally stable, and emotionally available. More an ambivert who takes time to get comfortable before I unleash my entertaining self. I neither get violent nor throw things in anger.

My lifestyle: I prioritize staying fit and enjoy traveling. Was an athlete and sportsperson back in the day. I have a few hobbies, and I do seriously dedicate my time towards them.

My preferences:

Looking for a Hindu woman, age between 28-38, <=5'7" tall, who is well-educated and doing well in her career.

While I’m not religious (I consider myself agnostic), I am fine if my partner believes in God. Even better if she too is an agnostic/atheist. I’m that kind of guy who plans trips or vacations during festivals. This is not a strict filter, however.

I would prefer a non-smoker, but I am fine with my partner drinking. In fact, I don’t mind picking up drinking myself if she insists on my company, or if it is a deal-breaker for her that her partner must drink! Someone fit and health-conscious would be ideal. The icing on cake would be if she has a few hobbies and enjoys pursuing them.

I also prefer staying alone as a couple. Preferably one kid in the future, but fine if we are not capable of having a child too for whatever reason. Would like to try having one, though.

Looking to meet a level-headed, career-driven, ambitious professional, and someone who preferably earns 30 LPA+ and intends to continue working after having a kid (following a break, of course). I do not come with a "provider" mindset. Clearly not looking for a woman who thinks her money is her money, and her partner's money is the family's money. The plan is to build our world together where both of us feel a sense of joint ownership, where we are equally invested in our emotional, financial, and personal growth. I truly aspire for us to be a power couple. I don't believe in the traditional husband-wife framework of our Indian culture, which is largely gender based. I want both of us to work hard and enjoy our lives together on our own terms.

Which also means that I am NOT looking for someone to handle cooking, household chores, or perform everyday religious rituals. As much as I wouldn’t want you to be in the kitchen, I would appreciate it if you wouldn’t look up to me as a provider. I want to be very clear about this.

I value someone who believes a relationship is a game where we play together as a team, and not a game of chess where we play against each other! I don’t want to spend time reading her mind and what she might do/react next, nor do I want her trying to read mine. I prefer open, honest, blunt, and unhinged communication where we can both speak our minds freely. Bonus points if you enjoy all genres of humor and don’t take offense at every little thing that happens in this world.

A progressive mindset is a non-negotiable for me. I would like to meet someone who is not conservative or super-traditional, as I don’t see myself living that lifestyle. At the same time, I wouldn’t want to meet someone who is into hookups and ONS either.

Not keen on meeting pseudo feminists or someone who is politically motivated/polarised.

I prefer someone currently based in Bengaluru (to make frequent meetings easier) or someone who wouldn’t mind moving here. I have been meeting both North and South Indian women here in BLR, and hence my preference here too remains the same.

If you relate to whatever I have written above and aspire for a similar lifestyle, please feel free to DM. Happy to share further details.

Thanks, and all the best with your partner search!