I know this subreddit is for body language, but I will also mention a few things he said for further context.

When we were sitting next to each other, his shoulder touched mine. There was plenty of room for him to sit further from me, but our shoulders touched. Neither of us pulled away. And our arms also touched. There was more than enough space on the table for him to avoid physical contact. And it lasted for at least 7 seconds, i.e. likely intentional.

I mentioned that someone I know is pretty and walks elegantly (a girl). He went quiet for a second. Then he said, "She's decent, I guess. But not my type." So I asked him, "What's your type". I should note first that the third-person pronoun in our native language is gender neutral, and we have no gender-specific pronouns. I'll use "that person" and "they" to replace the pronoun.

He then answered, "Hm, I don't mind whether that person is quiet or talkative, as long as they communicate". We were sitting across each other at the time at a table. Two minutes later, I stretched my leg forward under the table on purpose to make physical contact with his. He noticed it when he started shaking his leg. At first he shook it quite slowly, but it got faster. And he didn't pull away or ask me to move my leg away. This lasted for at least a minute before I pulled my leg away. He didn't comment on the physical contact.

The biggest sign I'd say is when he said "Hmm, you look handsome in this picture. I'm having an erection" with a smile on his face and eye contact, after which I started shouting as if I was going to tell a mutual friend nearby. He grabbed me by both shoulders, pushed me away and pinned me against the wall.

Also, at least three different people have made jokes that we're a gay couple, but he never directly denied it. He did say one time, "I have a girlfriend okay, well had" (because they broke up). But the idea of us being a gay couple, he has never expressed any sort of aversion to it. When we were talking (I suppose unnaturally close, and we were facing each other), a coworker asked, "why are the handsome ones always gay?". He went quiet afterward, put on earphones and didn't talk to me for an hour as he did his work on his laptop. But afterward, he acted like that comment was never said. He was still comfortable with physical contact. He also never pulled me aside and say that we're not boyfriends and that he's straight. He has simplh let that statement or "joke" be.

I'm fairly convinced based on the above, but since he said he's straight and he finds same-sex relationships gross, I'm not sure whether it's flirtatious or friendly banter.

TL;DR: I think my friend is closeted and flirting with me, but I am not 100 percent sure because he claims to be straight with ex girlfriends and that he thinks homosexual relationships are gross. He also said he wants to get married and have kids in the future, but he said some peculiar things to me as a straight man.

I need advice or opinions from fellow gay men. I can't ask my friend (let's call him Jake) directly as of now as it is still up in the air and I don't want to ruin our friendship.

Here is a list of things he said or did:

1. "You look handsome in this picture. I'm having an erection". I burst out laughing. He then grabbed me by both shoulders and pinned me against the wall to stop me from revealing his comment to a mutual friend nearby (as a joke). We were both laughing the entire time. Later he mentioned a few bystanders asked if we were a couple because "We looked happy as we chased each other around". Jake was surprisingly undisturbed by the rumour. He just smiled and even said "we're famous now"

2. "Wow, your shirt is unbuttoned. you almost seduce me" (also while smiling) when I forgot to button my shirt. This is also overtly sexual and unprompted. I just laughed and said "what the f**k".

3. I mentioned the word "arousal". It had nothing to do with him and wasn't meant in a sexual sense. But he randomly asked, "were you aroused looking at me?" while smiling and looking down. I asked him to repeat himself cause I didn't hear what he said (I did, I just wanted to see if he'd say it again). He told me it was just nothing.

4. He drove me back home one night and played love songs in his car, including Secret Love Song Pt2 by Little Mix (closeted LGBTQ anthem), granted it may have randomly shown up in his shuffled playlist and that he said a few times that he doesn't care about song lyrics and only listens to the melody. Regardless, isn't the chorus of Secret Love Song Pt2 very much on the nose about forbidden love? He also played other love songs about falling in love.

5. Just yesterday, we were hanging out with a mutual friend (Adam) who asked me about my sexuality. Jake said, "that's an interesting question; I also want to hear your answer". I lied and said I was straight, and asked Adam, "did you assume I was gay?". Adam said he didn't assume anything and was just curious. Adam also added that he has a lot of gay friends and doesn't mind people's sexuality. Jake was pretty quiet the whole time. He didn't acknowledge or comment on my claim that I'm straight, but he did say afterward that "this topic is interesting, it can still be expanded on". I'm not sure what he meant by interesting or still can expand on.

I should note that, personality wise, I'm feminine enough that a lot of strangers or close friends assume or believe I'm gay even though I deny it. I never have to bring up my sexuality because they all said "it is obvious". My close friends from high school often tease me, saying I'm gay even though I claim to be straight. I'm pretty sure he has at least considered the possibility that I'm gay.

For a "straight" man who supposedly finds homosexual relationships gross, I find it odd that he said all those things to me despite the probability that I'm gay from my mannerisms. Isn't he worried that I might misinterpret his "jokes" as flirtatious? Or is this genuinely banter or shock humour without any hint of attraction or romantic intent whatsoever? Do some straight men genuinely do this? Am I reading too deep into this?