My (23M) boyfriend (21M) have been dating for about two years and he picks me up from work sometimes when I can’t get a ride. He picked me up from work earlier tonight and I had a bunch of stuff to carry. I had a box of new socks and underwear that I got for us and a bag of food for later. I also had my backpack. The car ride went well, we just talked about our work days and plans for the week and we were talking about staying up a little to catch up on our shows. When we got home, I was struggling a little because I had a plethora of things to get out the car (the car was parked next to a wall, so the space would be tight to get out of too so I was a little stressed). My boyfriend left the car and walked to the other side and said “hurry up I have to pee.” I then told him that “I would have liked some help.” While I am still visibly struggling.
He then goes on to say that I should have told him so that he would have helped and that he would not have any problems helping. I told him that I think I should not have to say anything as I am visibly uncomfortable and trying to get out the car. He said that I always expect him to do something instead of just telling me. I then said oh so I should tell you what to do all the time and he said yeah i’m not a mind reader. The argument continues on and I go to do the dishes (his chore).
Like I understand that expecting him to help me out a little is unfair to him and I see his side but I do not think that everything needs to be explicitly stated especially after two years. I tell him this and he said that he knows that I have trouble communicating but this is crazy or something like that. He then said why can’t you accept that you’re wrong and I am right about this. Then I said I understand I am sorry I should have told you and I have to be honest I was a little sarcastic so he said you don’t understand and this is what you do you make a big deal of everything making it seem like I am a terrible person and that I don’t care when I would have been fine to help you and you know I would have been.
Then I felt bad and said I’m sorry babe I understand and he said no you don’t no you don’t and stormed off to his practice.
I just don’t know what to do at this point. I feel so stuck sometimes. I know I have issues with communicating and stuff and I am in therapy for it. Obviously 2 years of context can’t be in one post so I hope it comes across. How do I repair this so as to not ruin the rest of the night?
**TLDR:** I (23M) needed help and my boyfriend (21 M) said I should have told him and he isn’t a mind reader.