u/Hungry_Painting_615

i met men that just want a quick session but weirdly so many want to see me in a dress or skirt. I dont have anything against these type of clothing and sometimes even wear them if im really into the guy. But the last few guys i was with basically demanded it.

Also lately i only met men that dont want to recopricate

After i went down on them and they also refuse to be on the receiving end. That was the same for like the previous four guys i was with.

I dont really mind being a bottom but sometimes i also wanna lay the pipe. I dont know if im on a unlucky streak with the guys or if generally more gay men are like this.

Oh and dont get me started on their obsession for femboys. I dont hate or have anything against femboys but the obsession is getting ridiculous im suddenly expected to do a whole body shave just to get the worst blowjob i ever got.

One guy told me he thought every bottom is a femboy and then blocked me because i didnt want to give him a lap dance in a maid costume. ???? Like what? Where are the men that dont care about that cause i cant find them.

I dont wanna talk too much about it so im gonna keep myself short.

I was 7 years old and my cousin who's 5 years older kissed me and disguised it as a game. Since then whenever she came over she would pull me into a empty room and would do certain stuff but fastforward to now. Im 18 years old and the hookups with my cousin lasted till i was 17 years old. I dont know why i kept doing it but my body would just go on horny mode whenever she called me to have "fun". It fortunately never came to sex but we would just make out and go down on each other.

Im trying to figure out if im really a victim or if i really enjoyed it. All i know is something is wrong and since i dont really trust anyone i thought i should share my story and maybe someone who has the same feeling but overcame it might answer.