u/HungryBeyond9376

My girlfriend and I live together and have discussed buying a house late next year. We agreed it would be in our current town. She works in a nearby town but it’s a short commute and I primarily work from home. 

I applied for a new job last month and it’s in the town my gf works in. We agreed to potentially look for houses there if I get the job since it is an in person job. I could have selected other locations including a city fairly close to us but we discussed it and the commute would just be too long, 

I got offered the job and I start in 6 weeks. My gf has depression and has low periods. She’s currently feeling low and is mentioning buying a house in the city near us instead as it’s a nicer area with more to do as we currently live in a small town that isn’t great. I pointed out that would mean me commuting an hour each way which I wouldn’t be doing. 

I said she’s can’t be this erratic with major life decisions and can’t let her low mood just throw all plans out of the window. She said she wasn’t big I pointed out she’s started feeling low and is suddenly talking about moving somewhere new and changing her job. I said the commute isn’t just long, it would be expensive. 

She said the increase in pay would pay for it but I just said I’m not taking a better job to just spend all of my extra money on travel costs. She said I could look for something else but I refused since I was looking forward to starting this job and I’m not going to be immediately looking to leave. 

She said I wasn’t being fair but I pointed out she’s the one wanting us to uproot our lives just because she’s feeling low. I said I won’t be moving and she called me unsupportive and said I should be considering it.

AITA for refusing to move to a nearby city?

My girlfriend suffers from depression and because of this has had a lot of sickness with work. Her current job have tried to support her and have made sure she can speak to a psychologist at work for as many sessions as needed and have allowed her to reduce her hours.

Because of the sickness she has had to have a verbal warning though as she’s exceeded the amount of sick periods. She’s told she can’t have any more sick periods in a year otherwise it’s a written warning then dismissal after that. 

The issue is my gf seems to give up as soon as she’s feeling slightly down. Shes annoyed that dropping her hours haven’t pretty much cured her and I pointed out to her it was to help manage her symptoms and to stop them getting worse, not to get rid of them completely. 

This week she’s feeling slightly low. She still managed to go shopping on her day off and go out and see people but now is phoning in sick today. I told her she can’t just not go in whenever she isn’t feeling perfect and that if she skips work now, we’re pretty much screwed since I can’t afford everything myself, 

She called me unsupportive but I just said Shen weds to be more resilient and work with the psychologist on how to manage her symptoms when they appear and not expect them to just vanish. 

She again called me unsupportive but I asked how she was supporting me by doing this and causing the financial burden to be solely on me. 

She ignored my question and just said I should be supportive and should be there for her. 

Does anyone have any advice on how best to approach this or have any other views on it?

tl;dr my girlfriend has has a lot of sick days and has been told shell get a written warning if she has another within a year then she’ll be fired if she has one after that. shes Tl king about phoning in sick as she feels a bit low. when I pointed out we can’t afford for her to lose her job she called me unsupportive.

My fiancée and I are currently planning our wedding and are looking at the guest list. I lost most of my family so only have my sister still alive. My social life has also suffered and o only have a couple of close friends. 

This means my guests at the wedding will be around 7 people whereas my gf is talking about inviting her large family, close friends, friends she hasn’t spoke to for years and old colleagues she doesn’t even talk to anymore. 

I suggested maybe just keeping the wedding for people we actually talk to and are close to  and she said no. I mentioned instead of having her half and my half when it comes to seating we make sure people are spear evenly through both halves and she again refused. 

I pointed out the wedding isn’t just for her and she should be compromising. She said I wasn’t being reasonable and should be fine with her guest list and fine with having her side and my side. 

Does anyone have any advice on how best to approach this or have any other views on it?

tl;dr my fiancée and I are planning the wedding. She and I wasn’t being reasonable for expecting her to compromise on the guest list and not have separate his and hers sides to the seating plan.

My fiancé and I are currently planning our wedding and are looking at the guest list. I lost most of my family so only have my sister still alive. My social life has also suffered and o only have a couple of close friends. 

This means my guests at the wedding will be around 7 people whereas my gf is talking about inviting her large family, close friends, friends she hasn’t spoke to for years and old colleagues she doesn’t even talk to anymore. 

I suggested maybe just keeping the wedding for people we actually talk to and are close to  and she said no. I mentioned instead of having her half and my half when it comes to seating we make sure people are spear evenly through both halves and she again refused. 

I pointed out the wedding isn’t just for her and she should be compromising. She said I wasn’t being reasonable and should be fine with her guest list and fine with having her side and my side. 

AITA for expecting to compromise on the guest list?