Been playing around with the idea of sharing my knowledge and techniques of how to approach so I wrote a series on how to get more dates. This is part 1 of that series, How To Approach. The text is geared toward Men but I assure you that the techniques work the same for women as well.
Approaching is not hard. I believe this so much that I am willing to bet you are doing it already and do not even know it. I mean it. Let me prove it to you by doing a quick question and answer. Do you go to restaurants and order food with a waitress? Can you or have you said good morning to someone as you get on the elevator? When you go buy something at any store, can you exchange pleasantries with the cashier? If you answered yes to any or all of these questions, then you might have a condition called approachitis and you need to use it.
The situations I mentioned are what approaching really is. The problem that most people have is that they build up tension in their head trying to think of the perfect thing to say in the perfect situation. Instead of that, I am going to give you the best way to approach someone. Here it is: be present, ask a question, and listen. That is it. No pickup lines, no nonsense, just be present, ask a question, and listen.
Let me explain with an example. Say you are at the smoothie store and are looking at the menu, but it is your first time here and you are not sure what to get. Most people will find a tiktok that tells them what to get, ask the cashier for a recommendation, or blindly choose. What you will do instead is follow the rule I just laid out. Let's use this in our example. We are in line for a smoothie, not sure what to get, and we spot someone waiting for their order. You ask, "What is your favorite smoothie here?"
With something as simple as asking that, we have just opened ourselves up to the world around us. The best part about it is that it is a very natural way to start a conversation with someone, and it can be used in so many situations. You are out for a walk and notice someone wearing interesting sunglasses? Cool, comment on them and then ask where they got them. Be present and ask a question. It is literally a cheat code.
Now, the conversation might not end with a specific outcome, but at minimum, we have a smoothie recommendation, we are practicing our social skills, and we have shown others around us that we are handsome, confident, social men. It is a win all around. Now, I know what you are wondering. Well great, I ask a question, but what if they respond? What do I do then? Well, now we move on to the next step, which is reading the person to see if they want to continue the conversation.