u/Fun-Badger4769

Hey everyone! I apologize if this post seems silly. I’m 18 and freshly learning my body and have finally faced my fears of looking at my labia. It seems silly but I have been SO INSECURE about the way that my genitalia look(s?) forever.

I watch pornography and am often faced with labia that are much smaller/appear more tucked?

None of my partners that I have had before cared, but it greatly impacts my confidence.

I myself do not have any irritation/medical concerns with a larger labia like I have read some people do, and it’s purely cosmetic.

How do you guys deal with it? I do not want to pursue any kind of cosmetic surgery and am just looking for tips/ways to become more comfortable with it.

Thank you guys.

Hi all. Just writing here because I do not know how to end things with my boyfriend.

We are online/long distance and met at Christmas this past year (2025). I met him shortly after the biggest heartbreak of my life.

I wasn’t expecting to get into anything serious but I liked him and he liked me and we eventually started spending every second together, on the phone, et cetera. It was great until I realized how unrealistic it was, and until my aforementioned biggest heartbreak reached back out to me.

My boyfriend, for the sake of this post will be named Joe, is so sweet. He has major abandonment issues as his father left him and his sister and hasn’t had many friends stick around. Similarly, any of his romantic ventures have ended in them leaving for another person.

He is kind and gentle and on paper everything I could need, outside of one thing: he is extremely unmotivated. He is graduating and has little desire to find work, to come see me, to plan for moving out, et cetera. He also doesn’t do much outside of go to school and talk to me.

I am also very comfortable in where I am with him. I have zero desire to grow and better myself as I tend to pick up on the traits of my partners, so all I do is do my schoolwork (online high school), go to the gym, and talk to him. I’ve lost friends and my familial relationships have severely worsened because I am constantly around him.

Whenever we get into arguments/disagreements, he is quick to apologize and begs me not to leave him, even if it’s not something I’m considering. He consistently says that he loves me more than he loves himself and that he doesn’t know what he would do without me.

When he begs me to stay, he’s often very upset so I comfort him by saying what he needs to hear: that I’m always going to be here, that I wouldn’t leave, etc. even if I don’t believe it’s fully true.

I have loved being able to be here and support him and love him the way he’s never been loved before (his words), but it is so draining.

I have no time for my hobbies, and he is extremely clingy. I don’t know how to separate myself from him, even just for a few hours, without causing him anxiety.

I care deeply about him and I don’t want to be another person on the long list of people that have left him and let him down, but I have no idea how to end this relationship without completely destroying him.

Two months ago, the heartbreak reached out. I had stopped thinking of him, but when he messaged me I knew instantly that my feelings weren’t as “gone” as I thought they were. Now, I think about him every day.

It’s so unfair to my partner and I am not leaving to get with the heartbreak, but it did confirm that I do not love Joe the way that I thought I did.

Joe and I also frequently engage in phone sex and super intimate things that he has never done with anyone before. I am more experienced than him in that field, and I know that it means a lot more to him than it does to me. I feel like I am just making things worse and making him more attached when we do these things, too. It feels dishonest.

I constantly reassure him that he is what I want and everything but I don’t know how to stop lying. I don’t know what I want and I am overwhelmed by him.

He is graduating in a few weeks and has a job interview and I really do not want to end things because I know he will be devastated and potentially enter a depressive episode like he did when he has his first rejection/heartbreak, except even worse.