One thing I'm really loving about Saros right now, which I also loved about Returnal, is how it trains you to be good. So when you finally get to the truly insanely difficult parts, it's sooooo rewarding because you're genuinely really really good. And it's because this game forces you to get good. Tonnes of trial and error, tonnes of practice.
And then it's so satisfying!
I've been on HRT and it's been a life-changer, but I'm in the midst of a dosage transition, and it could be one or two months till I'm feeling better.
In the meantime, I'm really struggling to cope. It's like I'm being strangled by darkness and I'm panicking in it. I have AuDHD and I'm crippled by executive dysfunction. I just need to not lose my job or wreck my life in the next two months till hormones are settled. (i.e. I've been made to switch from two pumps of Estrogel to the lowest dose of Premarin, and I have to stay on the lowest dose for a month or so till they'll consider raising it. My pharmacist recommended I keep up one pump for a week to aid in the transition. I also take 200mg continuous P.)
I just need to be able to live, and be a person, in each excruciating moment of each excruciating day. I'm trying all sorts of things. I'm being gentle with myself, I'm reading, I'm birding, I'm trying to exist without thinking much about how horrendous I feel inside. But I feel beyond horrendous. I'm actually in a good moment in my life and my work, and I'm really scared this doom anxiety and spiked executive dysfunction is going to cause me to go from being a beloved employee to someone who gets fired. i'm nearly paralyzed.
Does anyone have advice? How do I get through this transition period? It's SO WEIRD having doom anxiety related to absolutely nothing in the real world. Like, the doom anxiety is *creating* the problems for me, which is then feeding back into the terror, etc etc.
I work from home. I ate lunch on my lunch break, and it's a few hours later.
I just noticed my teeth are brushed. I brushed my teeth without thinking about it. How? How did this happen? I never can do anything at all without thinking about it. It's not in my AuDHD coding to do things on autopilot.
I just... brushed my teeth? Without deciding to? Without even noticing I did it? Who even *am* I??