u/Famous-Upstairs-3493

I (22F) and my boyfriend (24M) have been together for a few years and lived together for most of that. We’ve recently been doing through a rough patch and working through everything, honestly just airing out everything we needed to ( as we realized communication has been an issue on his part). There is one thing that I have been having a hard time bringing up with him in fear of hurting his feelings. He just plain and simple doesn’t take care of himself. He has gotten better over time, but still has a long way to go in my opinion. Things like:

-taking his medication for hair loss that he has been prescribed
-smelling bad constantly(which in turn makes our bedding smell)
-doesn’t take care of his skin
-rarely gets haircuts
-doesn’t trim his beard
-doesn’t clean his fingernails
-breath almost always smells
-rarely wears deodorant or cologne
-isn’t taking blood pressure medication he needs to be
-he has also gained weight over the last few years and constant complains about it, but never does anything to change it

I know this is making me sound knit picky and like I just don’t even like him. But I love him so much and I just want him to be in a place where he WANTS to do these things. And I want to also help him get there but I’m scared he will take offense. We’re very close and open but I think this is just a sensitive topic and I don’t want him to think I’m not attracted to him anymore

Has anyone gone through something similar? What did you do?

2 days ago my boyfriend broke up with me. We have been together for almost 2 years and live together. He broke it off with no warning and I had no clue, after he packed some stuff and left. He showed up the next morning begging for me back, and I let him move back in. This was of course after multiple long and serious conversations, we are not back together and he will be sleeping on the couch until further notice. I think how this all was handled was extremely civil. We talked, cried, and most importantly listened to each other. I won’t get into the nitty gritty details of everything but I’m looking for advice because everyone in my life is making me feel like I made the wrong decision and I’m crazy. We are both content with our current decision and have a plan for moving forward.

Has anyone gone through something similar? What was the outcome?

This Friday I got home from hanging out with family and my boyfriend was at work. When I got home he was already back (which is weird because he gets off at 7 and it was only 6). I went inside and he was acting weird, long story short, he broke up with me. Never once got even an inkling that he was even thinking about this. Never tried to have a conversation with me. Nothing. I was just so shocked. He packed his stuff and left to go stay with his parents shortly after. I realized that this was way more premeditated than I thought. He had strategically packed stuff and I honestly thought nothing of it when I saw things were gone because I was that oblivious. I called my parents and friends and they supported me through the night. The next morning around 9am he shows up at our house and wants to talk. We talked briefly and he grabbed a few other items of his and left. Later in the day he started texting me and going on and on about how sorry he is and he made a mistake and I am the only one for him and the love of his life. All kinds of stuff.
As of right now we will be meeting tmr to talk a little more and all I want is for him back. I know things won’t be the same but I want to work this out and I love him so much.

Can anyone offer advice? This is also my first serious relationship and first true heartbreak.