Not sure how to feel about having a party thrown for me
I'm turning 18 and I'm also graduating at around the same time. My mom wants to throw a party for me to celebrate this milestone because i only turn 18 once and im graduating high school. For some reason i don't really wanna celebrate? Like i get that it's a big deal for her but i just don't really care but yet i know that in some part of me, i probably do care. Im not really a party person, i hate going to parties. The last time i had a big birthday party was when i was four, my parents went all out on everything. Now my mom wants to do the same this year. I'm crying as I'm writing this, (not sure why I'm emotional) and I'm just really confused and i need some support and help. I'm pretty stuck and i don't really know what to think.
I apologize for writing this in a rant style, please ask me questions if i left out any details or anything. Thank you for reading
TL;DR Mom wants to throw a party celebrating my graduation+bday, but i don't know what i should do or even think. Should i have the party or no?