I (25M) just broke up with my 22F girlfriend. We are long distance relationship of 5 hours apart. We met on Hinge last year July and have been dating for 9 months, until yesterday - I broke up with her 2 days ago when she was visiting me. She kept asking for a second chance - should I get back with her? I really need and Thank you for advice!! (I made an account just to post this and my English isnt very good, please don't judge...)
This was the first relationship for both us. When we met on hinge June 2025, we were both in the same city, I had a remote job living at home by myself and she was doing internship. She moved back to her univeristy city in September 2025 5 hours away. in the beginning, I am excited for a relationship (i never had one before) and happy to found a girl that liked me back, so we got together. We agreed we were both not looking for anything long term. We slowly built connections over the next 8 months. Besides long distancing, she is in every way the perfect companion for me, we share laughter and jokes for each other, share daily life moments through call and text, being there for each other day to day ...etc. When we visit each others city every 1 or 2 month, we will live in each other's apartment and go out for dates. We feel like we are the happiest couple in the world whenever we are together, because we don't get to be together often. When we separate and return to our city, she will be crying always. She calls me the best boyfriend in the world, and I genuinely love her and want to do everything I can to make her happy and be protected.
But as a selfish men (I'm an awful person), I often feel I am not satisfied by having only one relationship ever in my life, I don't want to settle at 25, I want to try dating more than once and have different experience with other girls. I feel awful for saying this but her physical traits are not attractive to me, so I am not really satisfied with the sex experience, but I have never told her, I always just think about other girls when we are having sex. - So despite all the loving feelings I have for her, and how well our relationship has been, I decide to end this this time when she visits, because the longer it last, the harder the breakup.
I told her I want to break up 2 days before she took the train, I told her I lost feeling. She cried so much and asked "can you still be my perfect boyfriend for the next 2 days??", i said yes and I cried too. The next 2 days were dates as normal, happy but bittersweet. She accepted the hard reality while saying she is confused, because for the whole time, we had been happy together and no signs of any things going wrong, then all of a sudden it had to end - it was hard seeing her having to accept the break up, I really wish we didnt need to breakup.
I proposed taking a break as a cool down period, then after period I will make a decision break up or not. We originally agreed on this but I took it back, because I knew the decision would likely be a break up after all, almost like I didnt want to her to "wait for a death sentence", so I chose to gave her the news when Im still with her in person. Before she took the train back, she said if I ever change my mind, I can always go back to her.
I feel despaird and I miss all the things we've done together, I really wish me and her can be still treating each other as a couple, but my disgusting and selfish desire to look for other partners couldn't co-exist with this. If it wasnt my urge and desire, I would love to spend the rest of life with her. What should I do, should I get back with her or stay with my original intention?
tldr: gf and I are the happiest couple in our world that shares 9 months of memory, I broke up with her 2 days ago because of my desire to date more than once in my life, I don't want to settle at 25, but I still have feelings for her. She asked for second chance, should I get back with her?