I have been getting bad leg cramps (yes I have let my doctors know) and am now thinking about asking for a decent massage gun for Mother's Day/for giving birth. Anyone take one to the hospital? Was it worthwhile? I may be induced-the hope is I go into labor early and deliver vaginally
I am 6-8 weeks away from delivery and I have a 4yo and will be mostly on my own prior to birth unless I am induced. While this is stressful it's not horrid and I do have support from my family and once baby is on way my husband will be on a trip home (he will b 4hrs away) I am more so nervous about other things, like I am nervous my baby may have t21 (lost a baby last year with t21) (was told I either have a <10% possibility of conception of t21 babies/baby with congenital abnormality or that was the lightinging strike of the t21 conception odds [1/800] and I am at a decreased risk since I was that odd-or they give a generic answer if you don't do testing that you may be at a 1% increased risk of having another t21) that's just the things I was told. The <10% chance was redacted based on not sufficient evidence. Our baby had a low NIPT score and accurate amount of sample- gender is correct- and we do have a non t21 older child so this helps my anxiety. Knowing we were having a child with disability was better than worrying about if we were or were not though and I don't feel it right to poke and pester my baby in the womb for more "possible" answers on this, so we are thinking we will have a healthy baby aside from some common health issues.
I struggle through my pregnancies, I should have been ng tubed in my first, I was picc lined and ng tubed in my second and I was ng tubed in this pregnancy. All of my pregnancies I have had to utilize medications and ivs to stabilize my vomiting/dehydration. In my first pregnancy we had not expected this, so I had lost my job and my husband had gotten a few promotions and bc of him being the provider and changing jobs and my poor health, he took off time in the pregnancy to get me to the hospital and could not take any time off after our baby was born. Now my husband has a stable job and has practically unlimited time off once baby is born which is really reassuring but we have two children now and we don't use daycare as our first born is in preschool most of the time.
What really bothers me though is I have a ptsd diagnosis that in the first pregnancy was treated with Zoloft. Our daughter was born and she was healthy but she was quiet and that did not bother me too much but she was very difficult to keep awake or get awake to nurse and I was severely worried about that. She also jaundiced a few days after which only got treated by the fact that we had several sunny days and a sun room-the pediatrician she had was very not interested and ready to retire. She was constipated and I had believed it was either bc I took zofran the whole pregnancy around the clock or bc of some allergy issue (which could of been the cause with why I was so sick with her in partial) no one was taking me seriously on this. I was exhausted and they were giving me meds like Benadryl to combat my "anxiety" and this created more anxiety bc I was scared she wasn't eating enough and that I was so tired I was not feeding her enough (which was true) and not receiving any help instead they were making things worse and I just shut up and took it. Years later we have had nieces and nephews born who jaundiced and also who were constipated and their assumption was allergies. Everything I said was going on with my baby was validly said to have happen to her cousins and they got treatment-mine didn't.
Since those times I had switched which health care company we utilize and now go to our local (we moved when our first was born) and I feel very comfortable with our pediatrician and receiving help from other staff. And I have had to receive a lot of help.
I started remeron (can't spell it right) bc it is like zofran and it is an antihistamine (which I have severe allergies and need anyways) it has helped immensely. I also was switched to Effexor for mental health instead of Zoloft. Effexor definitely doesn't numb me like Zoloft (which is great) I feel Effexor has been a game changer for me. I am on the lowest dose of both of these medications. The plan is for me to go off of remeron after birth bc I only need it for the pregnancy reasons, but to stay on Effexor. What I am nervous about is my baby being "lazy" from one or both of these meds. However with these meds I do not have to worry about baby having constipation issues, thankfully, and thanks to the remeron I am not taking boat loads of knock me out drugs every 4-6 hrs to keep my vomiting in check and so baby does not have that either, so I am expecting a more active baby at birth than my first but I don't know how active and I am expecting myself to not be drugged down as well, but there is exhaustion no matter what.
I did buy the nipple flow shield which soothes my anxiety and I got a few bottles that I will bring with immediately and so I'm not going to stress and I will make it clear to staff that they will not stress me on bf either, baby just needs to get to a stable point and if that means formula it means formula, or I can pump, I did fine with pumping supply and I have a cousin and a friend who I would trust who oversupply and pump and would lend me some.
If I colostrum collect this does mean it will have the remeron possibly in it, idk what to think about that, other than I can collect when it's lowest in my system.
Anyone else have had to be on these medications? What was your experience?
I just feel staff and doctors really underestimate issues with medications and that moms are not taking seriously enough.
I should also mention I didn't know any better with my first and they let us go home after one night. This time I am more than likely going to be in more need of physical recovery as my first was born within 5 hrs and was fairly easy to birth. This time I may be induced or c sectioned and baby is bigger. I plan on staying a full stay.
My father had Mother's Day as more of a "for your own mother" type of thing and apparently my mother felt the same way that she spent it with her own mother-my mom is getting old and her parents did not make it long into their 60s. I have always tried to celebrate Mother's Day but my mom's life choices don't really mix with my own. Her and my dad divorced years ago. She has remarried since. I am the only child of hers that stayed in the area that we children grew up in. She moved 1 1-2 hrs away. My siblings are all 45 min away from her. 2/4 siblings have kids and are married. She doesn't go to church (not shaming) so it's not like we all have a common denominator or location to all share Mother's Day/aside from her house which she would have to bring a meal anyways, so either we skip church and go over or we go to church and go over and then the day is practically over. My mom was slightly upset with me because even though I am planning on spending some time with her, I told her I felt it was more a holiday that my siblings without kids should make a priority while they can, and she apparently isn't happy that her oldest child does not do much with her on Mother's Day. I know my oldest sibling finds a decent gift with his wife and I imagine they spend the day doing what she wants which is probably spending time with her family or reading and he cooks for her.
I understand where my mom is coming from as her parents didn't live long in grandparent age and she is worried about this herself.
But like I said I never shook anything up and moved away, if she attended church I'd be going with her to said church and have a pleasant meal and move on with the day.
I really have lack of empathy towards this because my husbands mom felt we needed church and a whole picnic and these are people I detest as she is crazy and has lied to my husband and about caused a divorce with her lies-etc. she gladly would have the whole day if we talk to her but we don't and so I just don't push myself for other people anymore. Besides we can't actually make it work to celebrate a mil/my mom/and myself.
So much to unload
First pregnancy-diclegis/reflux/zofran/reglan-healthy baby girl
Second pregnancy-baby had t21/two other conditions/was expected to pass away immediately at birth-gtubed/hospitalized/picc lined
Third/current-remeron at 9 weeks/gtubed for a while.
I am 32 weeks and drained. My blood sugars have been high for a bit now and since I now have to switch from local care to another different Obgyn-I took the first available bc I just want to get my sugars managed. They might take me off the remeron which would give me either the option to get back on zofran/reglan/atarax which I felt caused me a great deal of exhaustion and I am already overly exhausted some days/also I feel caused my daughters constipation as newborn and she was really exhausted as well. I also take reflux med and an allergy med now. I just don't want the same struggles as before that I had with the constipation and her being to tired to latch.
I have prepared practically in any and all ways I possibly can-this area really stresses breast feeding and I also had to go through the formula shortage with our first so I do feel a want to breastfeed. I have the munchkin flow nipple which I think will help my anxiety a lot-I will actually colostrum collect and utilize it. I have reliable breast pumps and am going to get my breast pump through insurance stuff covered tomorrow, my husband will actually have time off this time around. My sister as well-my mom some. It sounds like whichever direction things go with the medication I still will likely be unfortunately induced which I mean I had been in a way induced with our baby we lost (second pregnancy-lost in second tri) and so I think I can handle it but I hear lots of women saying they hate it. This wasn't something we had imagined as our first was born within 4 hrs and a couple days of her due date. I just really hate this odd taste in my mouth-dealing with the stuffy head feeling-and definately hate the exhaustion and strain.
I think my body simply handled my first pregnancy weight gain better-yes she was smaller but even at the end I hadn't noticed pain and or discomfort.
This pregnancy has been uncomfortable in so many ways, I had terrible night sweats until mid second tri-and my rib cage area on both sides has always been strained and painful. We have had so many colds too which has just added into it. When my baby rolls or makes movement my blood pressure rises a little as it's an anterior placenta.
I feel the only safe space I can ever talk about motherhood/pregnancy is here
Hg has taken so much of my life and my spark and my dreams away from me and it feels like I am either a weenie/whiner/complainer or I simply just am living a completely different experience. I'm so tired of being around family that have children and it's getting unhealthy.
When we got pregnant with our first I had a job I had felt was probably the best I could do-it paid well, I worked there for over 5 years. I never imagined pregnancy would take me completely away from my job. My in laws were rude to me and life completely flipped on me when my daughter was born. A random doctor denied me the care I had been told to recieve (which was illegal) and somehow I ended up being not diagnosed but diagnosed with bipolar-the doctor refused to right it on my chart but kept telling me that was my diagnosis and she threw me on bipolar meds and added anxiety meds like atarax/lorezapam as well. Months later I recieved an actual diagnosis of ptsd and through extensive testing was found to have zero bipolar tendencies or connection. I think the reason for any assumptions towards it was because my mil and husband were the people I had in pp and there are a few people diagnosed with bipolar in their family and I believe either one or both have bipolar. My husband isn't as bad but my mil and sil flip on me in the blink of an eye. They are really intense about their own lives-my husband has called his mom a narcissist and we have had to permanently remove ourselves from their lives. They still harass us though. Mil sent us an anniversary card which stung because a month ago was the anniversary of our second babies death and you'd think the lady who still sends mail to our daughter (without including her name on it) and asks about her as if we mistreat her, has control issues and would like to believe that she raised our daughter when it's far from the truth-it was just us being kind to her and her unmanaged anxiety an control issues-who the last time we actually talked to her was a year ago about the death of our son-who hasn't asked us or bothered talking to us about anything for a year-would have sent us a sympathy card-she treats us as if he never existed. I was offered tmfr for him bc of his conditions and being sick with hg.
Her daughter and her and my other sil/anyone in my husbands family, pretty much have only dealt with infertility. I am treated like I over exaggerate and all of them have crapped on my husband and I-lied-twisted our lives around and we had hg on top of it. I just hurt so much about it
Now I am diagnosed with GD and I am almost done with this pregnancy. Today I couldn't do much because my legs cramped up so bad this morning. I know hg isn't to blame for this and it's more just my body fails me as a whole because I am petite and carrying a heavy baby.
Today I got in this mood bc a friend of mine posted her workout with her friends which is half of the community I live in. I feel like I am trapped in my own head. She lost her baby at full te a few months ago, I lost my second in second tri last year and I tried to save breast milk for nicu and I was bleeding out for a month and had to have an a and e for left over placental material. That pregnancy was the furthest in a pregnancy I have gone without having hg hit. I made it to 8 weeks. 8 weeks of a normal pregnancy and then bam picc lined and g tubed and blood pressure giving out... hospitalizations and the baby was never going to live.
I knew I was never going to