AITA for telling my parents we should leave my little brother behind from our family vacation
My brother (20m) and I (24f) are both students. We've had the privilege of having parents that are willing to support us, fully fund our private college educations and even extras such as family trips, etc.
However, I feel like my brother has become a spoiled brat. He's always complaining about my parents spending money on him, never thanks them when they get him something (even for Christmas or his bday) and immediately goes in on how much they waste, and how the kids he met in college laugh about how he's never had a job before. More recently, now he's even started to complain about family trips. We go on two big trips every year, and each time he complains from the minute we step on the plane to the minute we land home about how much of a waste of money it is and blah blah blah. AND it's exhausting! He refuses to have fun and just complains about us taking him places against his will. Like "woe is me, I get an all expenses paid trip to Brasil" how dare we honestly.
This year was the final straw, we were supposed to go to Paris. My parents spent months telling my brother about the plans, including him in every aspect, choosing a city that he is the only one that hasn't been to so that he would not feel like he was forced to come like he keeps saying. (BTW I am the one that suggested including him in all stages of the plan so he maybe felt more included). And now less than a week before the trip, he comes home from college, after a call with his gf (which side note she is low-income, I don't want to sound insensitive but felt like it's relevant, since a lot of this started happening after they started dating and she made comments about the money my parents give my brother) and tells us he doesn't want to go Paris so he can take a summer class (which my parents would also pay for btw). Mind you it would be a much larger waste of money to cancel all the NON-REFUNDABLE tickets and hotels and excursions and PREMIER LEAGUE SOCCER game tickets we booked JUST FOR HIM.
My parents are so sad and want to cancel the whole trip as they feel bad about leaving him. But I said we should just go without him and have fun, just because he doesn't understand the privilege it is to have parents that are so willing to provide AND have the capacity to, doesn't mean we have to be dragged down. Moreover, it feels like he's just being unhappy for the sake of it, because he's never said anything about my parents paying his college degree or his apartment or his lifestyle and the expensive presents he buys for his gf, BUT a trip is suddenly a burden and we're all out of touch. THE CRAZY PART IS NOW EVERYONE IS MAD AT ME?!!! As if I am the selfish one for calling him out and suggesting to leave him out of future trips.
So am I the asshole for telling them to leave him behind and for letting him know he is ungrateful/is fake virtue signaling or is he right?
EDITS I think are important for context/people have asked:
- He complains about going and says we force him to go to these locations but also wants to go. That is were the exhaustion comes from. There have been family trips were I have stayed back because it didn't work for my schedule or I simply couldn't take the time off, that's not the problem. the problem is saying he will go/wants to but then during the trip saying we made him.
- The reason I brought up his gf, was because since they started dating she's the one that was telling him he doesn't know what it is like to not be able to go on vacation or have parents that can pay for your education. I think that like he almost feels bad for her and bc of that has been taking it out on us, and saying the words that she says to him about him being out of touch to us.
- I work y'all. Whenever I have a trip I want to go on, I pay for myself and go with my friends. BUT HE DOESN'T DO THAT. he complains about having no autonomy but also has made no steps to pay for himself and gain that desired autonomy he speaks of.
TLDR: my brother is a spoiled brat that complains about spending money while actually having no clue about money and I called him out for it.