My husband (65) and I (63) have been married for 14 years, together 16. we are a blended family, both having been married and divorced twice. Children are all adults and out of the house. We are both employed full time.
The other day we got into an argument, he was mad at how I responded to him on a phone call He yelled and in my opinion was way out of line. one of his comments was that I think he will never leave because of money. —which one isn’t true. Over the last three years I have had a large jump in my income. we used to make close to the same amount, but now I make triple of what he makes. Ive also lost anout 55 pounds recently and look much better without the extra weight
After our argument he left, and I went on his computer. he normally keeps his desk drawer locked but this time it was open. I found a slew of drives with porn. The most upsetting part to me was there were THOUSANDS of photos and videos of women he had sex with-prior to us getting together. I can see him in the videos. he also labels them in very derogatory way. “stupid retarded name here, slut” “fat pig” etc
i am devastated. I knew he slept around before we met, but degrading these women for what purpose? Why keep them? some are 20 years old. why hide things he told me he couldn’t find them to delete them which is a lie thrn I found them saved on another drive
I’m just so upset and hurt we are old. any insight from others would be appreciated.
he can be very sweet to me over the years. he said to me if you are no longer in love with me set me free
i feel like I’m being manipulated. thanks for your thoughts