Man, I'm tired of lying to myself. I am attracted to older men.
I've been hushing my satyriasis for older men for quite awhile. And now, I'm coming to terms with it. Men younger than I am (25) have been such a pain to deal with and I love to relish the maturity that comes with an older gentleman. But I do have this inner fear inside of me, that persists. There's a significant tradeoff with respect to cultural connectivity, relatable things and other stuff, when you're seeing an older man. But I just feel like most of it is just unadulterated fear.
I live in a culture where most older men are married to women and I don't wish to be someone's side or l'objet de jouissance. So, by default there's less number of dudes who are in my vicinity. I am open to anyone from a different place, which isn't an issue.
One of my dear friends knows of my dating fails and has asked me, if I am comfortable with my own self, to which the obvious answer is no. I'm filled with dread when I think of getting into another relationship.
To conclude I love older men, I'm scared, time's running out, I don't know what to do and I feel hungry right now.