u/Electrical_Bother453

i know this is probably a very small issue compared to others here on this subreddit

my boyfriend made out with another girl several times when he was out at the club with our mutual friend on friday night. i feel like ill never trust him again.

he said he just couldn't stop thinking about the bad parts of our relationship, the arguments we've been having about HIM btw! because he's addicted to porn which is just another thing i'm trying to deal with.

i thought things were finally going so well, i thought we'd spoken about everything and cleared it up and were trying to work through them, but he said he just couldn't stop thinking about it and that's why he told her he didn't have a girlfriend and made out her. Several times throughout the night.

he told me straight away when he came home. i feel like such a pushover for forgiving him, but ive sacrificed so much for this relationship already and i want to give it one last try. i just want to pretend like it didn't happen. i keep looking at things around in our room and all i can think about when i see them is how he got them for me BEFORE he cheated on me, and now everything he gets me now is going to be from AFTER he cheated on me.

i feel like it's my fault he did this. i'm not good enough i'm not attractive enough. i don't know.

i just want to know if anybody else has been through something like this and if u decided it was worth a second chance. how did you ever trust your partner again. how long did it take. what changes did you decide needed to happen.

thank you

hi all,

my boyfriend is addicted to porn, and has been since he was very young. we've been together for almost 2 years now and it's been very very difficult.

he said he's done this time for good, and i want to trust him.

we spoke about it together really properly last night, about my own boundaries and how his addiction was really affecting me, and he said it would help him if i checked in on him and his progress.
before, i thought it would help if i didn't bring it up, but he told me that when he's not being held accountable, it makes it easier to relapse.

i was just wondering if anybody would be able to help suggest how i could check in on him and make sure he is still making progress and not relapsing. i would ask him, but i don't think he knows what he wants to hear either.

sorry if this post sounds juvenile, i'm just trying to navigate my way through this in the most delicate and supportive way possible whilst also trying to protect myself from the hurt that comes from this as the partner.

if anybody could give me any advice either on how your partners have checked in on you, or in what you would want to hear as support, i would really really appreciate it.