u/Efficient_Touch_1810

we never even dated.

i met this boy four years ago and ever since then, i knew i wanted all of his attention and love. we only talked for two months, but he made me happier than anyone has. he wrote me paragraphs of poetry almost every day. but eventually, i found out he had been talking to another girl at the same time. he chose her. this really hurt, so for years i have done my best to move on. i have dated other people, worked on myself, worked on my friendships, but then i saw him again. it had been three years since i had seen him in person last and i couldn’t help but text him. then we talked again, for about another two months everything was going perfectly how i wanted it. there were a few red flags over text but i just thought it was nothing. he’d text me every day and always send me hearts over text. then when i asked him about it he said he texts like that with everyone and that i was thinking too far into it.

i know i need to move on and ive tried so hard, i just dont know how. ive done everything to move on, i really dont know how. i just feel so stupid that i thought that he’d like me back. what do i do?

i’ve liked a guy for almost four years, not a day has gone by without me thinking of him. he has impacted my life so much that it is so hard to move on, even though i have a wonderful boyfriend now, and i feel like the worst person in the world.

i met him in seventh grade through a friend, he didn’t go to the same school. i had just left my boyfriend who was very abusive (physically and s-xually) and for two whole months, i had finally been treated right. he was just my type, he played the saxophone, we wore glasses, he had blonde hair and blue eyes, he had a passion for jazz, and most of all he made me feel loved. he would send me paragraphs of poetry about how beautiful he thought i was, i felt safe enough to tell him so many personal things, and he even told me he loved me after only two days of knowing me. but that love was only temporary, because apparently the whole time, he had been talking to another girl and he chose her. this broke me so much because of my past relationship and because i was very insecure.

so finally, i stopped texting him even though i wanted to so bad. i went two years without talking to him, until i saw him again. i thought texting him would bring my closure, but it really did the opposite and i fell even harder for him. we talked again, for hours a day, i thought we were flirting. always goodmorning and goodnight texts, always making sure im okay, sending me hearts. i became obsessed with every part of him, and then be became distant just like what he did when we talked before. then i confronted him and he said he never liked me in the first place.

i have an amazing and perfect boyfriend now, but i can’t help but wonder what life would have been like this the other boy. part of me still feels so much love for him, even though he broke my heart. i know i shouldnt like him, but i love him. i feel like some creep who won’t take no for an answer, i feel like some cheater for having feelings for someone else while in a relationship. in my head, he was everything i ever wanted even when he gave me nothing at all. he was everything to me and i was nothing to him and that crushed my soul.

i know i only feel this attachment because of the relationship i had just got out of and went back into after him, and because he kept leading me on, and because everything i thought of him was made up in my head. i know all of this but i still find myself daydreaming of him like he’s the one that got away. i really don’t know what to do.