u/Ecstatic_Tortilla

Okay, so my boyfriend and I have been dating now for 8 months. We grew up together and were in the same grade. We had feelings for each other in middle school but were mainly just friends. He’s had a few girlfriends throughout the years but I remained single. At the beginning of last year he dated his ex girlfriend for a few weeks but it ended because according to him she never gave him attention and made him feel like he didn’t mean anything. Apparently it was a hard relationship for him even though it was short because she’s in one of his friend groups and they all just pretended like nothing happened even when he was hurting.

Fast forward to last year around this time him and I started talking again and he eventually told me how he felt about me. We continued to talk and over the summer his friend group planned a trip. He asked if I was okay with him going knowing that his ex would be there and I said yes. (I hadn’t met her yet and him and I weren’t yet dating so I didn’t care).

Fast forward to the end of the summer and we started dating. It wasn’t until the first part of this year when he wanted me to officially meet this friend group of his. I went over and it was going good at first but then it started to feel off. (For the record I have anxiety and I get nervous around people but I really do try to step outside my comfort zone. So I asked him beforehand to stay by my side so I wouldn’t feel awkward).

It was instantaneous him and his ex immediately start chatting it up and I very quickly felt invisible since I had no idea what the conversation was about. And then I learned that he sends her a lot of the same stuff he sends me on Instagram, etc. It felt like she was his girl best friend.

He talked up this hangout like it was about introducing me to his friends but it felt like I was an accessory. There was no conversation between other people and I. He wasn’t trying to include me in conversation either. Eventually a day after the hangout I told him how I felt and he assured me that he doesn’t hold any feelings for her because of the way she treated him over a year ago but it still felt off.

(It felt kinda like that unspoken rivalry feeling between girls if you know what I mean).

I would say that I can be a very hard person to rattle but I genuinely don’t think I have ever felt like that in my life.

Anywho it’s been going good these past few months but end of March he was supposed to have dinner with my family but before he remembered he said that his friend group were going to go on a hike to celebrate his and his ex’s birthday. After I reminded him of my family dinner he decided to come to mine.

I thought that was the end of it but today I found out that this coming weekend him and his friend group (including the ex) are going to our state’s largest city for the day to celebrate their birthdays.

For the record I don’t wanna be the kind of girlfriend that makes their boyfriend cut friendships but this friendship in particular makes me feel so uncomfortable. And it’s like he doesn’t even get it. He still sends her stuff on IG and hangs out.

I don’t know. I just want him to get the memo without me having to push him?

What do you guys think… am I being too much?

Any good ATS scanner recs?