u/Dodo20987

I want to die already. I can't see a way out of my situation, I'm crushingly lonely and have always been this way.

When I think of the future, my mind goes blank. I have no future, I can only see more loneliness and sadness for my future; that is simply not a life worth living in my opinion.

"It gets better", that's bullshit, I've been waiting for life to get better since I was 10 years old. I've waited long enough. I hate my life. I've always hated my life since childhood to adulthood, just once I wanted someone to really see me and hear me, but it never happened.

Every day is the same. I wake up, doom scroll, work, go to school, all alone, everything alone. I'm on autopilot, a drone, a fucking NPC. I'm alive, but I'm not living my life; I may as well be dead.

It's a bit silly cause I'd expect myself to feel better around others.

Being around people and talking to other people just reminds me of how much I can't relate to other people.

For example, people around me like to talk about dating, concerts, raving, etc. I just can't relate to any of it at all. The only thing I do all day is stay home, doom scroll, and feel sad.

In many ways, this makes being alone and not talking to others actually feel less lonely to me. I feel so embarrassed to not really have anything going on in my life and not have plans to share with others.

I think I've come to the realization that I just can't connect with "normal" people, I need someone similar to me to spend time with.

Sadly, I'll probably never meet a person similar to me; the person I want to meet is probably staying at home and not talking to other people.

When I was younger, I thought for some reason that I had a lot of potential and that my life would eventually get fixed, and I'd be successful in life or some shit.

Well, I'm grown now, and I've basically accomplished nothing. I think that I can acknowledge that I've basically lost all value; there's not a single remarkable thing about me.

I've desperately wanted to get into a relationship these past few years to help with my loneliness and depression. But I've realized how unremarkable I am in every single possible metric, and I genuinely can't envision a single person taking a liking to me.

I'm a plain, unimpressive, and valueless person, so I think it may not be possible to get into a relationship for me.

I don't care about anything anymore. I just want to feel happy and not have to experience life alone forever.

Hate that shit, this is what's wrong with the world nowadays, people just expect you to always be happy, confident, and friendly no matter how you actually feel.

Feels like everyone partakes in this act, can't fucking trust people cause of this shit.

The number of times someone acts all friendly and nice to me, but it turns out they're shit-talking me behind my back, pisses me off.

I don't understand people. Why can't people just be straightforward? Why are people expected to fake all this friendliness and confidence?

I just want people to act how they actually feel so that I don't feel fucking deceived or always have to second-guess myself and feel suspicious of people.

Scrolling through Reddit, I'll occasionally see people expressing concern and asking for advice for their siblings going through loneliness or some hateful phase.

God, I really wish my siblings gave a shit about me enough to show me just a tiny bit of fucking concern.

I wish they had talked to me when I would get bullied in school, I wish they cared enough to check on me when I would stay in my room and cry, and I wish they at least checked on me when I got sexually harassed as a child.

Life isn't fucking fair. I just wanted the slightest bit of emotional support from anybody when I was struggling as a fucking child.

Why the fuck couldn't I have that???

Came back home in the evening from work, exhausted, and absolutely no one to welcome me home, so I just sat in silence.

It feels heavy, knowing that no one loves or cares about me, and the silence in my home is only a reminder that I am alone.

All my life, I've been a waster, and I still am. All I've done today is lie in bed, doom-scrolling TikTok, and feel sad about being alone.

I've wasted away all of my youth, now I'm an adult, and nothing's changed; I'm still doing nothing fun or important with my life.

Before I know it, I think I'll be an old man having accomplished nothing, and never having a close connection with another person.

I'm a waste of life, too depressed to give a shit about my future. All I want is someone to be with me, by my side, but even I'm incapable of that.