u/Distinct-Board-9793

I’m a female in my 20s and I met this guy of the same age more than three years ago. We are both from the desi community. He told his family about me a few months into knowing each other because they are a bit more progressive, they were very accepting and happy with me and still are. I have gotten to know his family over time and am close with them, specifically his mom. My family is very traditional so I didn’t tell them until about eight months of knowing him and suggested that I would like my parents to meet him and that I am interested in him for marriage. My parents were severely against this and said a lot of negative things about both him and me. He is a childhood cancer survivor and walks with a bit of limp that resulted from a surgery that replaced his knee-hip-femur with titanium. He has some limitations in his day to day but not many, he’s very active, plays pickleball for hours everyday, but more importantly, a very good man and good Muslim. Regardless of how active he is, I accept him as is. I don’t see those things as a problem. My parents eventually agreed to meet him and his family, which went very well, but they ultimately said that his limp looked bad and that he is weak and could get sick again, therefore I can’t marry him. I fought with them over this for a while, it’s been over two years, but they have still not agreed. They have consulted with my extended family members who say the same thing. No one in my family is on my side. My dad constantly says I am a bad daughter for wanting a love marriage. Although my mom doesn't agree, she says this specific marriage is not okay and backs my dad. I don’t know what to do anymore. They would constantly threaten to kick me out of the house, which they did not do and stopped threatening eventually. Now everytime I discuss this with them they give me an ultimatum to marry him and leave the house or stay in the house and leave him.

TLDR: my parents won’t let me marry him because he is a cancer survivor with a limp.

I’m a 23F and I met this guy (23M) more than three years ago. We are both from the desi community. He told his family about me a few months into knowing each other because they are a bit more progressive, they were very accepting and happy with me and still are. I have gotten to know his family over time and am close with them, specifically his mom. My family is very traditional so I didn’t tell them until about eight months of knowing him and suggested that I would like my parents to meet him and that I am interested in him for marriage. My parents were severely against this and said a lot of negative things about both him and me. He is a childhood cancer survivor and walks with a bit of limp that resulted from a surgery that replaced his knee-hip-femur with titanium. He has some limitations in his day to day but not many, he’s very active, plays pickleball for hours everyday, but more importantly, a very good man and good Muslim. Regardless of how active he is, I accept him as is. I don’t see those things as a problem. My parents eventually agreed to meet him and his family, which went very well, but they ultimately said that his limp looked bad and that he is weak and could get sick again, therefore I can’t marry him. I fought with them over this for a while, it’s been over two years, but they have still not agreed. They have consulted with my extended family members who say the same thing. No one in my family is on my side. My dad constantly says I am a bad daughter for wanting a love marriage. Although my mom doesn't agree, she says this specific marriage is not okay and backs my dad. I don’t know what to do anymore. They would constantly threaten to kick me out of the house, which they did not do and stopped threatening eventually. Now everytime I discuss this with them they give me an ultimatum to marry him and leave the house or stay in the house and leave him.

TLDR: my parents won’t let me marry him because he is a cancer survivor with a limp.

I’m a 23F and I met this guy (23M) more than three years ago. We are both from the desi community. He told his family about me a few months into knowing each other because they are a bit more progressive, they were very accepting and happy with me and still are. I have gotten to know his family over time and am close with them, specifically his mom. My family is very traditional so I didn’t tell them until about eight months of knowing him and suggested that I would like my parents to meet him and that I am interested in him for marriage. My parents were severely against this and said a lot of negative things about both him and me. He is a childhood cancer survivor and walks with a bit of limp that resulted from a surgery that replaced his knee-hip-femur with titanium. He has some limitations in his day to day but not many, he’s very active, plays pickleball for hours everyday, but more importantly, a very good man and good Muslim. Regardless of how active he is, I accept him as is. I don’t see those things as a problem. My parents eventually agreed to meet him and his family, which went very well, but they ultimately said that his limp looked bad and that he is weak and could get sick again, therefore I can’t marry him. I fought with them over this for a while, it’s been over two years, but they have still not agreed. They have consulted with my extended family members who say the same thing. No one in my family is on my side. My dad constantly says I am a bad daughter for wanting a love marriage. Although my mom doesn't agree, she says this specific marriage is not okay and backs my dad. I don’t know what to do anymore. They would constantly threaten to kick me out of the house, which they did not do and stopped threatening eventually. Now everytime I discuss this with them they give me an ultimatum to marry him and leave the house or stay in the house and leave him.

TLDR: my parents won’t let me marry him because he is a cancer survivor with a limp.