u/Dense-Survey-888

(dating for 8 months) Being near her makes my life 10x better and she's so awesome and kind, but whenever she talks about our relationship in public it just makes me uncomfortable, like we're breaking social norms and like we seem weird to other people. I think it partially stems from me worrying other people will think we're too young to be in a relationship, even though we're a perfectly normal age for this (we're not doing anything $3xual)

So when she says something or does something that I get anxious about, I feel like I kind of push her away and then I feel bad.

Also, I see online of people portraying relationships and none of them really line up with what I feel towards her. I am definitely attracted to her but I don't get the thing I see online where I say dumb things or get really nervous around her.

TL; DR: when she talks about our relationship in public it makes me embarrassed, and then it makes me worry about if I really like her.

Am I just being a dumb teenager? Is media different from reality in this way too? Am I being a jerk to her? I need advice.

Note: I don't know if I have autism or any sort of nuerodivergency, I just thought this would be the best subreddit to post this on. Also, this is my first post on reddit, so pls tell me if I do anything wrong.

Tl:dr, I'm new to reddit and not diagnosed with anything.

Anyways, it started a couple years ago, when I still took organ (the instrument) lessons. After I got a note wrong, I would kind of automatically shake my hands in the air in frustration, in a similar manner to like- after you wash your hand if you don't have a hand towel. But even after I quit organ lessons, when I'm stressed or exited or there's just a lot going on, I shake my hands. It's not a conscious or even subconscious decision to just release some energy, it's just automatic. But if I notice it and try to hold still, then I can suppress it. It makes me more stressed though.

Writing this out makes me feel like I'm exaggerating it for attention, but I don't think I am. Does anyone know what this is, or if I'm overreacting and everyone does this?