u/CuriousRabbit103

How do you cope with being related to a narcissist?

Hey, I’d just like to preface this and apologize if my description of things is confusing or vague. I tend to talk I circles and just generally seem to confuse people. If you have any questions or just need more info, please ask! Also sorry in advance if I come across as rude. It’s not intentional. I’m not entirely sure why I come off that way. I do have some theories though.

So, my father is a complete narcissist. He’s an absolute nightmare and even though I cut contact with him multiple years ago, he’s still finding ways to make my life hell from afar. Like he liked to say my mother was an insane and abusive drug addict. He would then, in the same breath, tell me how I was just like my mother. That I was manipulative and selfish among other things. I was eight. He’s that kind of crazy. The courts and police where he lives somehow to be more useless than your average house fly, so he managed to get away with literal crimes with no consequences whatsoever.

I am completely disgusted by the fact that he’s my father. It makes me want to pluck my eyes out so I don’t have to see the physical traits I have that remind me of him, even though they’re smaller than my catalog of social skills. I’m also pretty freaked out by the possibility of turning out like him and hurting others.

Does anyone else deal with this and if so, how do you cope with it? I’ve tried a lot of meditation and self-love stuff and I’ve been doing it for years, but it’s just not helping me. Does anyone have any advice?

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u/CuriousRabbit103 — 6 days ago

I (20 F) had a bunch of tests done when I was in middle school. They tested me for a whole bunch of developmental disabilities, but my mother refuse to let me see the results. I want to know if I was diagnosed with anything because I was treated by ACES ABA shortly after the tests. This agency only treats autistic children. I want to know why I was treated there.

I have asked my mother about this, but she won’t tell me anything. I asked for the test results as well. She won’t provide them. Her reasons for why she won’t let me see them keeps changing. For example, she once tried to lie to me by saying she didn’t have the test results at all, but later she changed her story and said she had the entire report but then wouldn’t tell me where it was.

I have no idea why she’s lying to me. I don’t know how to get her to show me the results and I’m starting to think I’m just overreacting. I have a tendency to overreact to stupid things so I really can’t trust my judgement on this.

Am I overreacting by being suspicious that my mother is lying to me? Like is this concern warranted or am I going insane? I’ve been trying to get ahold of these for a long time and she keeps refusing to show me and it’s really freaking me out.

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u/CuriousRabbit103 — 7 days ago