This is my first reddit post so sorry if I’m missing any rules! My (30f) fiancé (29m) has been sending flirty text messages to an ex coworker (26f) for the last few years. He says they are just friends and I am overreacting.
For background, we had a fight about this same girl sending him flirtatious texts after we had been dating for 3 months. Things like ‘why aren’t you at post work drinks… I miss you’. I told him it made me uncomfortable and he promised he would only speak to her about work related things. She was the receptionist so organised a lot of his trips interstate etc so they couldn’t be NC. I thought that was the end of it but over the last 6 months I’ve noticed him being very secretive with his phone, not leaving it out like before and having it on dnd all the time.
Last night we were scrolling through his TikTok and a suggestion to forward a video to this girl came up. We both ignored it but later that night I decided to go through his phone. I saw 100s of texts from the last 2 months alone. Apparently she left and got a new job 6 months ago but they’ve kept in contact almost daily. They talk about how much they miss each other and how they only want to go to run club if the other is going. He also recently started asking if she wanted to go running just the 2 of them. As far as I can tell they haven’t actually caught up outside of work yet. He promises they are just friends and he was keeping it secret because he ‘knew I didn’t like her’ and didn’t want to upset me. He has many female friends I have no problem with because they don’t have a flirtatious relationship. We are supposed to get married in 6 months and we share a house and dog together. Is this something we can get over or should I call it now?