u/Comfortable-Ad-1072

Hi everyone, I finally got my Mirena removed after a year - and after 5 months of trying to get it removed because the strings were too short.

The actual removal was surprisingly fine. I felt basically no pain during it, just one small cramp (I did take ibuprofen beforehand).

Now it has been over 12 hours and I keep going between cramping and not cramping. Is that normal? I had not had periods or cramps for almost a year, and before Mirena my periods used to be a bit painful.

I have also been reading about the “Mirena crash” online, and honestly having the Mirena itself was a nightmare for me emotionally, so I am a bit anxious about what comes next. Did everyone experience a big crash after removal, or was it manageable?

I am also nervous about getting my period again and whether it will be worse than before.

Would really appreciate hearing other people’s experiences 😊 Thank you!

Hi everyone, I finally got my Mirena removed after a year - and after 5 months of trying to get it removed because the strings were too short.

The actual removal was surprisingly fine. I felt basically no pain during it, just one small cramp (I did take ibuprofen beforehand).

Now it has been over 12 hours and I keep going between cramping and not cramping. Is that normal? I had not had periods or cramps for almost a year, and before Mirena my periods used to be a bit painful.

I have also been reading about the “Mirena crash” online, and honestly having the Mirena itself was a nightmare for me emotionally, so I am a bit anxious about what comes next. Did everyone experience a big crash after removal, or was it manageable?

I am also nervous about getting my period again and whether it will be worse than before.

Would really appreciate hearing other people’s experiences 😊 Thank you!

Adding the link of my experience with Mirena, to avoid explaining it again and make this post longer

Hi everyone,

I (32F) recently ended a relationship with my boyfriend (30M), and I feel really torn about whether I made the right decision or if I gave up on something that could have worked.

We were together for about 1.5 years. There was a lot of good between us. He is kind, affectionate, intelligent, hard working and a big dog lover / nice person. I loved being with him, and I do believe he loves me deeply too, which is what makes this so hard.

The issue is that over time, there were repeated problems around alcohol. He does not drink every day, but when he does, he often goes too far. This is not just occasional overdoing it - it has happened around 10 times throughout our relationship in ways that really impacted me.

There were nights where he got so drunk that he vomited all over the bathroom and I was the one cleaning it. More than once. There were also situations where he put himself in risky or embarrassing situations, like insulting strangers or taking drinks that were not his. He has lost his keys, his glasses, left our cat outside by mistake, and come home so late and out of it that he would wake me up shouting for me to open the door.

One moment that really stuck with me was when I had just had a small minor medical procedure and was in pain. Instead of walking me home or making sure I was okay, he chose to stay out drinking with his friends and sent me home alone. That really hurt.

We talked about this many times. He would apologise and promise to moderate, saying he would stick to a couple of drinks. Sometimes things would improve briefly, but then it would happen again in a different context - with friends, family, or at events. There was always a reason.

Over time, it started to affect me a lot. I became anxious when he went out, not because I wanted to control him, but because I felt like I could not rely on him. When I brought it up, he sometimes felt criticised or controlled, and I ended up feeling like I was the difficult one. I never wanted him to stop going out or drinking completely, I just wanted some level of moderation and consistency. We live in Ireland, I tried telling him to stick to maybe 5 pints and not over 10 pints.

On top of that, we are not fully aligned on bigger life plans. I am starting to think seriously about having children in the next few years, and he wants to travel more and only think about kids in about 5 years. When we broke up, he said he would stop drinking completely if it meant not losing me and that he would have children with me, but I have heard promises about change before, so I struggled to trust that.

The final situation that pushed things over the edge was him missing a flight after a night of drinking with his friends because he overslept. I tried talking to him and explained the importance to controlling his drinking because it can impact his life and he only looked at me and said that anyone can miss a flight. It made me realise that this pattern was still very present, affecting real-life responsibilities and he couldn’t see it.

I reached a point where I felt like if I stayed, I would be going against myself. At the same time, I am scared of regret and wondering if I gave up too soon, especially because I know he has a lot of good qualities.

So I guess my question is: AITAH for breaking up with him over this? Was this a valid reason, or did I overreact?

Thank you for reading 🤍

Hi everyone,

I (32F) recently ended a relationship with my boyfriend (30M), and I feel really torn about whether I made the right decision or if I gave up on something that could have worked.

We were together for 1 year and a half. There was a lot of good between us. He is kind, affectionate, intelligent, and when things were good, they were really good. I loved being with him, and I do believe he loves me deeply too. That is what makes this so hard.

But over time, there were patterns that kept repeating, especially around alcohol. He does not drink every day, but when he does, he often goes too far. And it is not just “a bit too much” - it has shown up in ways that made me feel unsafe, unsupported, and exhausted.

There were nights where he would get so drunk that he vomited all over the bathroom, and I was the one cleaning it. More than once. There were situations where he put himself in danger or behaved in ways that were completely out of character - insulting strangers, taking drinks that were not his, losing control - never aggressive though. He has lost his keys, his glasses, left our cat outside by mistake, and come home so late and out of it that he would wake me up shouting for me to open the door.

One of the moments that really stayed with me was when I had just had a minor medical procedure and was in pain. Instead of walking me home or making sure I was okay, he chose to stay out drinking with his friends and sent me home alone. That hurt more than I can explain.

We talked about all of this many times. He would apologise, promise to moderate, say he would only have a couple of drinks. And sometimes, for a short while, things seemed better. But then it would happen again in a different context - with friends, with family, at an event - always with a reason.

Over time, it changed me. I became anxious when he went out, not because I wanted to control him, but because I felt like I could not rely on him. When I tried to bring it up, he sometimes felt criticised or controlled, and I ended up feeling like I was the difficult one. I always kept telling him that I didn’t mind him going out or drinking, I just wanted him to drink less, instead of 10 pints, maybe 6.

On top of that, we are not fully aligned on bigger life things. I am starting to think seriously about having children in the next few years, and he still wants more time to travel and enjoy life, then think about kids in 5 years. When we broke up, he said he would stop drinking and that he would have children with me, but I have heard promises about change before, and I struggled to believe it would be different this time.

I reached a point where I felt like if I stayed, I would be going against myself. At the same time, I am scared of regret. I keep thinking, what if he really does change, just not with me? What if I walked away from someone who could have been the right person?

I would really appreciate honest perspectives from women who have been through something similar. How do you know when you have given enough chances? How do you deal with the fear that they might become the partner you needed, just with someone else? And have any of you left a relationship with a good person because of patterns like this, and how did that turn out for you?

Thank you for reading 🤍