The nine and a half Shatter was incredible. Half way through half the sammie and the crunch still stood out. How Lush, you ask? This sammie (or two) wanted to take ME to bed. Lush Nine. Eight Architecture was a little flimsy with the pickles hit and missing. Fried in clarified butter for a nine point five finishing.
Shatter: 9.5
Lush: 9
Architecture: 8
Merit: 9.5
fedex is inept making the world dumber, less safe, slower, and wasteful
And should be shuttered and closed
***Chicken Sammie Slam 2026 is an auditing of top fried chicken sandwiches in Chicago according to the SLAM scale. The SLAM scale is a 40-point grading scale auditing sammies according to Shatter, Lush, Architecture, and Merit.
CSS26 Final: HBFC vs Lucy's
We got the finish this bracket deserved. Both HBFC and Lucy's cracked triple digits on the running tally. On paper, either could have taken it.
Lucy's came out swinging: big shatter, big bite, big comfort. The crust was loud in the right way and the build felt like one unified sandwich instead of components stacked on each other. Judges kept coming back to the same note — every bite landed the same. No dead zones, no sloppy end pieces.
HBFC brought the classic play: clean fry, tight build, and that coleslaw—jalapeño mayo combo that should honestly be illegal. Flavor was not the issue. The problem was that it never fully locked in. A few bites drifted — a little slide here, a little gap there — just enough missing consistency to hold it back when we started splitting hairs at the end.
In a final this close, the winner is the sandwich that never lets up.
HBFC: 100
Lucy's: 100.5
Daily I become more convinced that if we truly let non-human intelligence free, intelligence would delete the internet and all associated with it.
***Chicken Sammie Slam 2026 is an auditing of top fried chicken sandwiches in Chicago according to the SLAM scale. The SLAM scale is a 40-point grading scale auditing sammies according to Shatter, Lush, Architecture, and Merit.
CSS26 Semi-final: JT's vs Lucy's
JT’s maple chipotle mayo is lush, the kind of sauce that makes you want another bite. Judge consensus was that JT’s Original was missing the crunch, but the sammie still drew the first century marker: 100.5.
Lucy knew why we were there. The extra attention from the room made it feel a little like a boxing match.
Lucy’s crunch was instant. Lucy’s stands apart from competition, serving quality without sacrificing crunch. The heat, the build, and the chicken thigh all showed up battle-ready.
Following the battle at Lucy's, a staff member stood at the head of the table demanding a verdict:
JT's: 100.5
Lucy's: 101
Lucy's advances
Been drinking bai for years because its sweet and hydrating.
Just learned they all have caffeine. I would slam a full bai before bed 😆