u/Busy_Access_1300

Just want some thoughts. I [29M] went on three dates with a woman [29F] I met on Hinge. First date was April 11, we chatted over coffee for like 2 hours. A week after that, dinner at a restaurant nearby. Third was a hike where I baked some cookies and brought them.

I thought things were going pretty well. She was unusually engaged with me — we were both reciprocating a couple messages back and forth daily, she enthusiastically agreed to every meetup I suggested, and she suggested some things we could do herself. She had to fly out for a brief work trip the day after our last meetup, and when she got there she started sending me photos of things she saw. But since she returned from her trip last Wednesday the messages have turned into a trickle. I suggested something we could do over this last weekend and she said she was too tired from her trip and would need to skip. It set off alarm bells because it was the first time she's turned me down and hasn't suggested an alternative. But sure, maybe she is a bit burnt out, that seems plausible. I texted her again Saturday, we chatted briefly about our weekends, I sent something for her to read that I thought she'd like... and nothing since then.

Should I let her message me if she wants, or should I send her something lighthearted I've wanted to send and see if she picks back up? The drop-off in engagement from her trip was so sudden, i don't know what happened. I've been thinking over our dates and admittedly I don't think we've gotten past surface level yet, and we haven't been intimate, but it normally takes me at least a few dates to get there.

My gut is telling me I should probably just wait for her to say something if she wants?

Welp, here we are. I [29M] matched with a woman [29F] on Hinge maybe a little more than a month ago. First date was 3 hours over coffee, then she suggested dinner a week later. After that hike and boba a week later; finally another day we went to an art festival, drove around, had a good time.

This was the first time in my memory when a woman actually seemed enthusiastic about me. Remembering everything I told her, enthusiastically texting me about her life, asking lots of questions, speaking in "we" about stuff we should go do. Then she said she was going on a brief work trip and started sending me pictures from the trip. Thought everything was fine and going great.

Last day of her trip she has a long day at a conference before she's going to get a 5+ hour flight back, so I assumed she would be busy and I didn't need to bother her. Sent her one brief message just updating her on something we'd discussed previously, assumed she may not respond until the next day because of the travel and... nothing. Never heard from her again. She kept looking at my IG Story for a few more days and was gone.

Craziness! She was so sweet and good at communication, I really didn't expect it. It was so sudden too, going from warm and effusive to gone, just like that.

At least it was a brief romance so I think I'll be okay after a few days but man, I really expected her to at least tell me she wasn't feeling it anymore. I've never ghosted anyone before, I've definitely sent messages saying I don't think something is going anywhere, but never just completely disappeared